hominidae: (just jenny)
Jenny ([personal profile] hominidae) wrote2016-01-15 09:12 pm
Entry tags:

Open RP post!

? Pick one of my characters (see below) OR drop any character of yours in and get a random choice.
? Use RNG and enter 1-14 for a scene; roll again for specifics.
? Or cheat and just pick something.
? You can also just throw a picture, quote, or whatever kind of prompt you want.
? OPTIONAL: combine a bunch of memes and scenarios and go nuts.


A. Decide you know this person! (Cast mate, previous CR, etc.)
1. WAKE THEM UP. You don't care how friendly you are to the person in your bed; they need to get up.
2. PRANK! Oh, this has just got to stop. They need to be punished. But how?
3. CAN'T BEAT 'EM, JOIN 'EM. Push 'em over & snuggle up. You're too tired to deal with this craziness right now. Or sleep on your couch.
4. LET THEM SLEEP. Whatever. It's noon. They're asleep and you've got things to do. Regard them or disregard them.

B. Decide you have NO CLUE who is person is! (No CR, cast mates who have never met, cross-canon, etc.)
5. SCREAM 'OMGWTFBBQ GET UP!' Really. Default action going on here.
6. PRANK! What a better way for you to remember this moment of meeting than by painting a mustachio on your new 'friend's' face? (Remember, it's your bed. Be wise what you do.)
7. GENTLY AWAKEN THEM. Oh, the poor dears! They must be exhausted, but they can't stay here. Be nice, even if it isn't IC for your character. This is what you get for rolling. Shake them up quietly. Or re-roll.
8. GET TO KNOW THEM NON-BIBLICALLY. Well, they're asleep. But they left their wallet, important work, or identification out (no matter how OOC it may be)! Let's see who's REALLY sleeping in your bed. (Use your own judgment on what you find. AS a suggestion, have the most they find is the sleeper's name and maybe place of work.)
9. TIE 'EM UP. FUNCTIONAL typing up. Not kinky, no matter what the other party might think. Let them continue their blissful moment of rest. They'll answer questions later and you'll be safe and sound.

C. Decide - I do what I want

1. BREAK DOWN. Oh snap. Your car decided to break down out in the middle of nowhere. WHAT DO? Is that Leather-face? Will this be "Children of the Corn"?
2. HITCHHIKERS? Is this even a good idea? Threads may also have a third participant. Go wild.
3. WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST HIT? Dude, I hear deer mess up cars... Or I think that was a deer...
4. DON'T MAKE ME TURN THIS CAR AROUND. Alas. You're the parent or disgruntled friend who has had it up to here with all the fighting in the back. This thread may also have a third or even fourth participant, if you can wing it.
5. OMG, I WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS LANDMARK! No, no, and no. You tell that person that they're going to be driven around and they're going to like it.
6. THE GREAT ESCAPE. Either dinosaurs or the moth-man is chasing you. Don't stop now.
7. MAKE OUT. For whatever reason, the person you're traveling with in the car. You would love to make out with them and then some.


1. SWEET DREAMS. It's been a long day and all you want to do is sleep or just rest your eyes for a bit. Hopefully whoever is close by doesn't mind if you use them as a blanket.
2. STORMY WEATHER. The heavy rain, thunder, and lightning won't be letting up anytime soon. Luckily, it's the perfect weather to stay indoors and snuggle up close and keep warm.
3. SLOW DANCE. It's the end of a party, or maybe it's only the two of you, but the tempo is slow and the lights are low. Let your dance partner take the weight and just sway.
4. SURPRISE ATTACK. Time to invade someone's personal space. Are they working too much and need a distraction? Maybe you just wanted to brighten their day. Either way, they won't see it coming.
5. MOVIE NIGHT. It can be on the sofa or in a darkened theater, but you've got your popcorn and someone to settle against during your favorite movie.
6. I LOVE YOU, MAN. It's totally platonic, really. You're just very good friends, no matter what people like to think. But you just love your friend so much you want to hug them, whether they like it or not.
7. JEEPERS CREEPERS. Welp. You were just frightened. Was it a spider in the washroom, a ghost in the attic, a bad dream? Either way, you're looking for someone to cling to right now, and who better than that person right there?
8. HURT AND COMFORT. Whether you're sick in bed, just been dumped, or suffered a traumatic event, you need someone to wrap their arms around you and make everything go away.
9. SUNDAY MORNING. Maybe you just had a wild night. Maybe there's just not enough space at your place and you need to share your bed. Or maybe you just got really tired and someone else happened to be there. Doesn't matter because now the person with you looks way more comfortable than any blanket or pillow. Drape to your heart's content.
10. MOMENT AFTER. You just had incredible, vigorous sex and if you weren't a cuddler before, you are now. You're probably too exhausted to do anything else anyway. Just enjoy the moment.
11. PLAYER'S CHOICE. Pick one or make up your own!

1. INJURY. You've been injured. Broken bones or bleeding out or maybe just a tiny little paper-cut. The choice is yours.
2. SICKNESS. You're sick and laid up in bed, at home or in a hospital. The severity is up to you.
3. FEAR/ANXIETY. Something is happening and you're scared beyond belief.
4. LOSS OF SENSES. Sight, touch, taste, hearing, smell, etc. You've lost some important sense or ability and now you're left to deal with it.
5. DESPAIR. Nothing is good or right anymore and you can't shake the depression. Maybe that friend of yours can help though.
6. MAKE UP. Fight or break up, it's time to make up.
7. RESCUED. You've just been held captive and/or tortured for however long and finally, someone has come to the rescue.
8. BAD ROMANCE. Fight, cheat on, abuse, whatever the case is, someone else can clearly see you need comfort from someone who isn't your terrible lover tonight.
9. LOSS. You've experienced a loss of some kind and need help getting through it.

1. FISTFIGHT. Straight-up, unfussy, no-holds-barred face punching. Clearly you're emotionally invested in this argument. Or maybe you want some stress relief.
2. BAR FIGHT. Someone's had one too many drinks. Curses are being slurred, bottles are being smashed. Just don't be surprised if you get thrown out.
3. VERBAL. A caustic, intellectual battle of wits? Or just immature playground insults? Either way, the fighting here isn't physical; sticks and stones can break your bones, but we'll see if words can hurt you...
4. WEAPONRY. Fencing practice or a real sword fight? Paintball or battlefield gunfight? The only limits are your imagination (and the extents of human military engineering, of course)!
5. SPARRING. Maybe you're a streetwise punk teaching the new kid on the block the ropes of self-defense. Or perhaps you just want to get some practice in before your karate exam.
6. SEXY. That collar-grabbing led to a kiss, that knee stayed in a place a little too long, those gazes got a little intense... There's heavy breathing here, but it might not be because you've been exerting yourself.
7. DUEL. You insulted the wrong person. Or got caught cheating at cards. A duel, sir, a duel! The glvoes are off (and slapping you) and it's pistols at dawn.
8. COMPETITIVE. Boxing, wrestling, martial arts, the possibilities are endless. Just remember: the first rule of Fight Club...
9. OTHER. Combine any of the above, or make up your own!

1. WATER-DWELLING. You've grown gills, or your skin is turning translucent, or you're sprouting fins, or maybe you're outright turning into some form of sea life. It doesn't matter what you're turning into - what does matter is taht you're slowly losing the ability to breathe air, and there's no water in sight.
2. ANIMAL. Something bit you, and you're turning into an animal. Your bones lengthen or perhaps shrink, break, twist, and reform. Your teeth lengthen or shorten. And above all, you feel your instincts being overridden. Your senses sharpen; you notice smells you never did before. Your vision becomes more sensitive to movement. If you're a predator? Man, these people look mighty tasty. Prey? OH GOD. EVERYTHING IS TERRIFYING. Lizard? Enjoy your new inability to regulate body temperature. Bird? Have fun with the whole beak and hollowing bones. And don't get us started on insects and arachnids.
3. PARASITIC. Something's inside you, and it's changing you from within, chewing up your insides and altering your thoughts. You're not sure how much longer you're going to be you, and when the parasite's going to take over completely...
4. DEMONIC. You've been meddling with dark powers beyond the ken of mortal man, and it seems you've accidentally sold your soul. Will you be the traditional kind of demon, horns and hooves, or something far more terrifying and ineffable?
5. UNDEAD. No doubt about it, you're dying. But as you are, something's been altered in you. Maybe you're becoming a vampire - and not the fun kind either; we're talking ugly, ravenous, and mad. Maybe you're a zombie, or a ghoul, and human flesh looks mighty tasty. Or maybe you're just turning into a ghost bent on vengeance. In any case, death is never fun.
6. CYBERNETIC. Get captured by the Borg? Strapped to an operating table? Injected with nanites? Whatever happened to you, you're slowly turning into something half-human, half-machine, and your squishy bits are being replaced by mechanical components.
7. LOVECRAFTIAN. You've heard their song, the terrors from beyond the stars, and even no they sing in your blood as your flesh transmutes into something ineffable and unknowable. You revel in the pain. You feel even as you seek to spread it, to herald the end of all things... Or maybe worse. You're aware of the transition as your mind becomes not your own.
8. FUSION/HIVEMIND. You've begun to fuse with the first person who tagged you - physically, mental, or both. Soon, you can't tell who is who, which one of you is the real you, as your thoughts become one. Join in the flesh song, mortal.
9. INANIMATE. Your body slowly petrifies and hardens, tuning to stone, wood, glass, or something stranger still. Or perhaps you liquefy or maybe you dissolve into the air itself.
10. WILDCARD. Pick whatever you like, combine a few options, or make up your own.

1. CLASS TIME. Pick your class, pick your seat. Whether you're paying attention or goofing off, you're interacting constantly with someone else.
2. BREAK TIME. Those precious minutes that aren't lunch, usually half an hour if you're lucky. Are you hanging out on the grass, rushing to get homework finished, or bunking off school early?
3. LUNCH TIME. Food, glorious food! ... As long as you're not eating the school lunches. What sort of chaos will you get up to in the endless queue that is the lunch line?
4. FOOD FIGHT. The natural reaction to being served school lunches: throwing them as far away from you as possible. You're caught in the middle, or maybe you're instigating it. Who knows? No one can tell.
5. STUDY PERIOD. Yeah. "Studying." They mean catching up on gossip, right? Or watching that crappy TV in the common room? Or maybe you really want to study. I'm not judging.
6. SKIPPING SCHOOL. Did you even get to school before you bunked off somewhere? Or did you just take the bus five stops further and in to town? Hope you don't get caught, either way.
7. EXAM WEEK. You're going into an exam, or just cramming every last bit of knowledge into your head. Either way, good luck! You're going to need it.
8. DETENTION. What did you do? Or were you innocent and wrapped up in your friend's scheme, and now you both have detention? I do not envy you at any rate.
9. SUMMER HOLIDAY. SCHOOL'S OUT FOR SUMMER! Burn your books, burn your uniforms. Everything is over for another 6 weeks (or however long you get off).
10. FACULTY. Oh, hello miss/sir. No, we weren't talking about bunking. Yep, you're the teacher. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you get this option, you or your partner can do a second roll for the scenario.
11. TAKE YOUR PICK. Free for you. Whether you want to pick something from the list, or make up your own scenario, this option allows that. (Of course, you could just bypass the rolling entirely.)

1. LAST ACTION HERO. You tried your best to save the world, but despite the superpowers, the teamwork, and the sacrifice of many good friends, you couldn't quite pull it off. Now you're left with your guilt and a universe where half the people left are depending on you to help them, while the rest are trying to hunt you down for your failures. Good luck with that, hero.
2. SCIENCE SAVIOR. They said it was impossible, they said it was futile, but you know that if you just got a little bit of support you could fix all of the world's troubles. Maybe your experiments are a bit on the unethical side, but the survival of humanity is depending on you! You can't let the world down. Time to grab those test-tubes and get yourself a lab assistant that doesn't mind getting their hands dirty.
3. THE LAST PERSON ON EARTH. Well, it's finally happened. A virus or disease or genetic mutation has all but wiped out members of the opposite sex and humanity is doomed. But what's this? A lone survivor? As the savior of the species, they'll be glad to lend a hand (or reproductive organ) to help restore the population, right? Maybe a little bit of persuasion is in order.
4. SO LONELY. You haven't talked to another person in days and you're starved for conversation. So when you finally meet another lone traveler it makes total sense to stick together, right? Maybe share some food, some companionship, some ammo. . . . Better hope you both get along.
5. MUTATION STATION. The bomb dropped and some people weren't fortunate enough to go in the blast. Now those left behind have to deal with nuclear winter, a dwindling food supply, and some strange additions to the human gene code. Maybe these super-humans are friendly and misunderstood. Then again, maybe they just want to eat your brains.
6. LAST DANCE. The world is ending. You know it, everyone knows it, so the only thing left to do is party like it's 1999. Complete your bucket list, do the things you never got the chance to do before, and maybe screw up the courage to do the things you were too scared to even think about doing. Oh, and watch out for looters.
7. FREEBIE SCENARIO. Anything you can think of that isn't already mentioned can go here.

1. EROTOMANIA. That person loves you. They belong to you. They might deny it and be with someone else but they're ridiculous. You know better here.
2. DISTRUST. Simple as it sounds, you're being lied to. You can't prove it but you're not falling for their tricks anymore.
3. HALLUCINATIONS. A vague classic. Those sounds, those sights, your senses are screwed up and the world is upside down. There's plenty of senses to screw.
4. TAINTED. You're completely wrong. Is it in your family's blood? Is it parasites? A disease? Aliens? A sin? But it's consuming you, whatever it is.
5. CONSPIRACY. Why are they after you? Who knows. Maybe you know. But everyone is in on it and you're the only one left fighting against it.
6. CONTROL. Your actions aren't your own, even if others insist they are. Somehow, either drugs or magic or something, someone is making you their puppet.
7. FIXATION. Either it's in you or someone else or a thing but this imperfection is clawing at your mind. Just fix it. Fix it and you can rest.
8. FOLIE A DEUX. The more either you or the other person talks, the more you feed into this unease and the more real it sounds. What can you two alone do?
9. REPLACEMENTS. Is it just this person or is everyone being replaced with a fake? You're not a fake, though. You won't let them replace you.
10. REAL. Is any of this real? Maybe you're dreaming or drugged. Maybe you're dead. But you need to prove that this is really happening, whatever it takes.

X. Texts From Last Night
1. Pick a character or leave that up to me
2. Go here (or make something up, insert a tfln gif whatever)
3. Comment.
4. See where it takes us!

1. LOST. Oh shit, how did you even get here.
2. ON THE RUN. Getting away from someone or something that's after you.
3. TREASURE HUNTING. Something you desire is here. Maybe it's being guarded or you're competing for it.
4. TRAVELLING. You turned up here on purpose. Why is up to you.
5. ESCAPE. Things have gone wrong and you need to get out of this place.
6. DISASTER. Something awful has happened whether you're the cause, a witness or there to help.
7. INVASION. It's a siege! Are you defending or attacking?
8. HOME. It's actually where you live.
9. DUEL. The predetermined location to end a feud.
10. WHATEVER. Just make something up, whatever.

1. BED. Waking up after a wild night or just getting ready for bed?
2. OFFICE. Getting a leg up at work? Caught in a moment of indiscretion?
3. YARD. Someone's been communing with nature...
4. CAR. The warmth of a heater during snowfall... or the air conditioner during a melting summer.
5. BEACH. Oh look, there's a floating swimsuit... and there's its owner.
6. RIVER. God, can't even fish without hooking the wrong species.
7. BATTLEFIELD. Oops, someone looted the wrong corpse... who isn't actually a corpse.
8. SCHOOL. All right, who's been raiding the locker room?
9. BATHROOM. . . . Oh, hey, who needs a shower, right?
10. PARK. Sun and grass and lots of people to . . . watch . . . oh my.
11. . . . CLOTHES?? Okay, technically they are clothed, but it's not their clothes dammit.
12. OTHER. Because there are way, way too many more places than I can think of)

1. PHYSICAL INTIMACY. It might just be innocent touches or it might be foreplay.
2. LONG CONVERSATIONS. Honest words can be more intimate than touch.
3. DRUNK. You're over-sharing or simply maudlin.
4. FORCED INTIMACY. Magic. A truth serum, whatever - you didn't mean to bare your soul, but that is precisely what you're doing right now.
5. SLOW-DANCING. There is something inherently intimate about trusting someone else to lead you, and someone trust you to lead them.
6. OTHER. Intimacy can come in many forms. Pick your poison.

1. BOUNTY HUNTERS. You're wanted. And someone is chasing you. Maybe it isn't your fault? But maybe you did rob that bank. Either way, there's someone after that price on your head. Confront them, or run? Specify hunter or hunted.
2. TRUTH. You can't tell a lie. Maybe both of you can't, or only one of you, but now is the time to ask those embarrassing questions.
3. OBEDIENCE. The person posting is compelled to obey, no matter what. (Un)Fortunately the person commenting is compelled to give orders. All orders given must be obeyed.
4. LOTUS EATERS. The person posting is trapped in their own dream of personal paradise. The person commenting is trapped with them. Help free them, or fall into paradise?
5. PLANTS OF DEATH. Plants are trying to kill you. (Something's . . . happening.)
6. INSOMNIA. One or both of you can't sleep, and that sucks. Be awake together.
7. DREAMWALKING. One of you is trapped in the other's dream - or nightmare.
8. SOULMATES. You are meant to be, whether the relationship is functional or . . . less so. Maybe you've just met and yet you know this person (previous lives okay here).
9. PICTURE/QUOTE PROMPT. Throw a bunch of pictures and/or quotes around and see what happens, free-form style! Try RP Visualosities or A Sea Of Quotes.
10. OTHER-WORLDLY. Go to the Other-Wordly blog and hit 'Random' until you get a word. Use the word as a prompt to write up an RP scenario. Do this several times if you like. Mix & match.
preemptiveforgiveness: (It's all okay)

Katniss | Modern AU

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-02-29 12:04 am (UTC)(link)
At one time Matt had hoped the crime in Hell's Kitchen would be solved by taking Kingpin out of rotation. However, that hasn't been the case and he's pretty disillusioned about it. In reality, this disillusionment hasn't changed much in either his lawyer life or his vigilante life; if anything, he's only grown more determined and more grim. Hell's Kitchen can be saved and he'll at least help that cause as long as he possibly can.

It's a few weeks after Kingpin is put in jail that he hears about an underground fighting ring. At first, it doesn't seem much like something Daredevil would get involved. Once he finds out that the combatants aren't there voluntarily and are teenage runaways (primarily) snatched from the streets and forced to fight to the death in an abandoned warehouse, he changes his mind. He wouldn't be able to live with himself if he didn't take care of it.

He'd like to say it was a nice in and out job, but that would be a lie. It took weeks to hunt down who was behind it, to disable him and put an end to the fights. The finale comes one night when there's a scheduled fight. Matt gets in, disable the guys, sends the betters running and calls the cops. He's sending the teenagers toward the front entrance when he notices the dark headed girl near the back who seems reluctant to move. Regardless of much he talks to her and tries to assure her, she's not going with the cops. She's eighteen, she tells him. They're going to try her for multiple counts of murder despite the fact that she was forced to kill to survive. He's got little choice but to take her back to his apartment with her, but only after extracting a promise that his secret identity stays secret.

He'd thought it would be for a couple of nights until she could call her family and go back home, but it turned out that she didn't have any family or anywhere to go. A couple of stays turned into a longer stay and he got her several jobs in an attempt to help her be independent. Katniss is not a good employee. He hears from employer after employer (generally people he's helped that are doing him favors) that she's rude and surly. She's a hard worker, everyone agrees on that but she's just not a people person.

After living with her for a couple of months, he knows they're not exaggerating, but she's beginning to come around. When it's just the two of them she's funny and kind, pleasant and intelligent despite having large gaps in her education. She is a hard worker: his apartment has never been so clean and he doesn't have to call Claire for minor injuries anymore. There's a sort of tentative trust between them and while they're still working out what they are to each other, he's no longer looking for her a place to live, a job however...

He's also denying any and all growing attraction that he's got to her. She's eighteen, inexperienced and reliant on him. It would be taking advantage. They're friends, or better yet, she looks at him like a father or a big brother.

That evening, he comes home from the vigilante gig a little beat up (it's gotten better since he's begun wearing the armor though). Katniss is up (not waiting for him) when he straggles in, pushing off his mask. It's a relatively early evening for him.

"Let me change." It's actually easier with Katniss up because he's given his room over to her (it's impossible for anyone not blind to sleep in the living room because of the giant digital sign right outside the full length, huge windows that was the reason for him getting this place so cheap). Besides, he doesn't mind the couch. It's not like he's ever comfortable with all the broken bones, bruises and cuts he encounters.

He returns dressed in a pair of soft sweat pants and a dark tee shirt. "Can't sleep?" he asks her. He knows that she gets nightmares. He hears her in the middle of the night even when she thinks she's being quiet.
stillplaying: ([serious] intently listening)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-04 05:17 am (UTC)(link)
They had never been rich growing up but they did, at least, have enough to keep food on the table and everyone in decent hand-me-downs purchased from Goodwill. Bushwick might not have been the safest place to live but there was crime all over the city. It had been home. Life had been good. And they had been happy. Then, when Katniss was nearly twelve, everything changed. Her father died on the job for Con Ed and her mother had a mental break. Katniss had been willing to do anything to keep herself and her sister out of the foster system. She had taken a risk in dropping out of middle school but she had done so anyway. There were enough people willing to hire a hardworking kid under the books as cheap labor.

She hadn't realized what she was getting into when she had agreed to take the job in Hell's Kitchen. All Katniss could focus on was the amount of money they were willing to pay. She had been sixteen at the time and not naive enough to think that the job wouldn't involve time spent on her back or knees. But for Prim, she'd do anything. Even kill.

That had been two years ago. So long as she continued to fight in the arena, money continued to mysteriously appear in her banking account. A lot of the times, she won. Those had been the bouts that had been fights to the death. Some fights she had been forced to lose and suffered severely for it. At some point, Katniss lost count of all of it. All the children that she had killed. All the beatings that she had endured. The days blurred together. But she survived. She survived so much.

Now she doesn't have to survive. Thanks to Matt Murdock, she can live again. Katniss could have gone home that night that Daredevil had busted the underground fighting ring. After explaining an abridged version of the past two years, he had agreed not to make her go with the police. Matt had taken her to his apartment instead. She should have left to go back to Prim and her mother the next day. But she wasn't the same girl that had left Brooklyn. Her family was better off with her keeping away.

Adjusting to a real life proved to be more difficult than she thought. Working in bodegas and coffee shops had been common place for her once. Now she wants nothing to do with the people that come and go from these places. There's only one thing that Katniss thinks that she's good at these days and it's killing. For Prim, she does her best to work the jobs and send the paychecks home. Matt tends to cover most of her expenses, as well as giving her a place to live. She doesn't need the money for herself.

Katniss had thought that her ability to care for anyone other than her immediate family had died with her first kill in the arena. Matt's proved her wrong. Though she's certain that he sees her as a younger sister or daughter or something, it hasn't stopped her from developing a crush on him anyway. So tonight, when he comes back, it's not the nightmares that still has her up but fear for his safety.

She watches him quietly from the couch as he walks in and pulls off his mask. She clutches her knees closer to her chest and frowns at him as he enters the bedroom. When he comes back out in the sweats and tee, Katniss has a hard time spotting any visible wounds but that doesn't mean there's not something hiding under the clothes. She wants to reach out and touch him to find out but Katniss refrains.

"Yeah," Katniss mutters, still trying to search for wounds beneath clothes. "How's the perp?"
preemptiveforgiveness: (Isolated)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-04 11:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Matt has never had the sort of experience that Katniss had to live through. Yeah, he'd lost his father and lived the rest of his childhood in an orphanage (no one wanted to adopt a blind, angry kid). He'd worked hard though, gotten that scholarship to college and he'd become a lawyer so that he could fight injustice. That hadn't been enough though, which is when he'd started being a vigilante.

He doesn't blame Katniss for the life she'd fallen into. Once she'd made that (uninformed) choice, she hadn't been able to get out, not alive anyway and he knows that. She hadn't had any choices and she hadn't wanted to do what she'd done. He can't condemn her for that, but he can help her get back on her feet, learn to live in the real world. She's very low maintenance and she helps out where she can. Besides, it's nice to have someone to come home to, but if she ever decides she wants to live on her own, he won't tell her that. He doesn't make a lot of money, but he doesn't need a lot either. There's enough to take care of both of them.

He's trying to see her as a younger sister or a daughter because he doesn't want to take advantage of her. She's young and she's unexperienced and she's had a horrible life. He wants to make things better for her, not more complicated.

HIs ribs are sore and there's a cut on his cheekbone. The armor helps though. He feels like he's been hit by a mack truck and he's got bruises forming all over his body, but there's nothing to sew up, not tonight. He sits down gingerly on the couch and leans back, head resting against the back of the couch. There's a foot or so of space between them.

"The police have got her and she's not going to be bothering anyone again. Not here anyway." He turns his face toward her, eyes unfocused. "How was your night?"
stillplaying: ([serious] alert)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-05 04:43 am (UTC)(link)
In the months since Katniss has moved in, she's learned a lot about the boy that Matt had once been and the man that he's since become. She knows that he had been in the very foster system that she's done her best to avoid. Sometimes, he makes her think that maybe she's made a mistake by keeping herself and Prim out of that system. Matt Murdock grew up to be a good guy. Successful. Everything that she wants for Prim. But Katniss? What can Katniss can say about her own future? That it's not much? That she's already ruined it?

For some reason she doesn't understand, Matt doesn't see it that way. He sees a potential in her that she doesn't see in herself. She can't help but almost love him for that. She shouldn't though. Unrequited love feels horrible. Not that she's ever had much experience with it before. A lot of the way she feels towards Matt is new to her. She's never wanted before, not like this. She still doesn't know what to make of it most of the time.

Some days it's easier. Nights, really. When her eyes are closed and she's trying to fall back to sleep after a nightmare and she pretends for a few seconds that her life hadn't been what it was. Instead, Katniss tries to imagine that her relationship with Matt had been completely normal. That they met in another way. She can only imagine how good it would feel having sex with a man she actually wants. How nice that might be. But that's not reality. Instead, she remains Matt's friend. He's offered her his home and Katniss makes up for it by being as helpful as she can. It's easy, really; she's been the head of a household for the past seven years of her life.

Despite all of this, he still thinks that she's young and inexperienced. She might be young, yes, but she feels so much older. Katniss has lived through more than most girls her age. It might as well be lifetimes in some respects. How he can consider her inexperienced is beyond her. How he still sees any good in her puzzles her.

But he does and she's still here because of it. Even though she shouldn't, once he sits, she reaches across that foot of space to lightly touch the cut on his cheek. Katniss looks down at her fingers and grimly smiles when they come away relatively clean of blood.

"Not as eventful," she finally says, still looking at her fingers rather than meeting his eyes. "I'm still in one piece."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-05 03:46 pm (UTC)(link)

Matt doesn't mind talking about his childhood, not anymore and he'd wanted Katniss to feel comfortable here with him so he'd told her a great deal about himself. Eventually they'd settled into a comfortable existence where conversation wasn't strained, awkward or one-sided. He'd been very lucky to have people in the system that had cared about him. His case worker had been fantastic as had the nuns at the orphanage (for the most part) then there had been Stick, who in the long run hadn't been so great, but had definitely had a huge part in making Matt the person he is today and the vigilante that he is. He taught him how to use his powers, how to use his disability to his advantage and how to be independent; he taught him to fight and, in Foggy's words, be a ninja (Yes, it's the plot line to Kung Fu Panda, still true though). She hasn't ruined her future. She's too young to have ruined her future. She's just starting out again and Matt is determined that she will have one, and a good one.

Katniss is a survivor; she's already lived through things that would have done most people in and despite all of that she hasn't turned into one of the people that Matt hunts in the night. That alone speaks volumes about the potential in her. She's just got to figure out where to apply that potential. As for unrequited love, though neither of them realize it, it's not unrequited on Matt's part; it's more denied. He should love her for a long list of reasons that he lies on the couch in the middle of the night and composes. It would be so easy to slip into the bedroom at night where she sleeps, but that would make him a horrible person and he's not that person, no matter how much he might think about it.

The real reason that Matt thinks that Katniss is inexperienced is because he doesn't know about her experience. It's far too horrible to contemplate that sex had been forced upon her as well as self-defense and murder. He doesn't have that in him to think that someone would be horrible enough to do that. As far as he knows, all she ever had to do was fight and kill, as if that wasn't enough. In any case, even if he did know about that, she's still inexperienced at relationships and how a real one works, how sex ought to be rather than how she's experienced. He sees good in here because she's trying to start over; she's trying to leave all of that behind. She's trying to be a good person. That's admirable in and of itself.

Despite the fact that that cut is tender, he tilts his head ever so slightly into the touch. Being blind has made Matt very tactile. He can tell so much from a person's touch, from the way their heart beats and most of the touching that Matt gives and receives in the form of violence and combat these days. Claire hasn't been around since long before Katniss came into the picture and he hasn't been on a date since before then.

He reaches out to take her hand, his fingers curling around them. "Hey. I'm still in one piece." He takes her hand, and if she'll allow it, rests it against his chest over his heart. "I'm okay, Katniss."

He thinks she worries because she's afraid of being abandoned again or being on her own. He's got no idea it's because of the feelings she's got for him.

stillplaying: ([happy] fond of you)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-05 08:37 pm (UTC)(link)
It's been a long time since Katniss has opened up to anyone as much as she's opened up to Matt. At first it had been extremely awkward. She'd sit there quietly as Matt would talk, occasionally grunting or nodding in response when appropriate. But the more that Matt had been willing to share, the more Katniss had felt comfortable talking about her own life. She never commented on the truly tragic parts. Instead, she talked a lot about Prim. She'd also talk about her father and what had life had been like up until he died. It's only been within the past month that she's offered small tidbits about the nightmares that would come at night.

Though Matt has some sort of (misguided?) belief in her, Katniss doesn't have that same belief in herself. Prim will have that good future, that life like Matt's. She'll be whatever she wants to be. Katniss' options are much more limited. She has a sixth grade education, nothing more. Worse, she's killed multiple times. All it would take is someone to recognize her and rat her out to the cops and she's certain that her rap sheet would be as long as half the villains that Matt takes down in the night. Theft, murder, prostitution, assault... The list has to go on. She did what she had to in order to survive but in the process, she narrowly limited future options. Then again, Katniss doubted that she'd live that long to care. Overall, it's okay if her affections remain unwanted. She's not the kind of girl someone like Matt ought to be with anyway.

Their chats have grown more in depth, more intense. But there are still things she won't tell him. On some level, she'd much rather have Matt draw her own conclusions about her life than fill him in on the details. For the most part, the jobs she had found had been legal(ish) before finding herself in the Games. He knows that she's killed and Katniss is okay with leaving it at that. She doesn't want to see his reaction if she ever told him everything else. There's something about her that Matt likes or he wouldn't let her stay in his apartment or keep calling in all his connections to get her a job. She doesn't want to ruin that.

Of course Matt would notice her touch. He probably noticed the second that she raised her hand towards his cheek. She watches as he takes her hand in his and curls his fingers around her hand. Her heart skips a beat as he moves her hand to his chest. Katniss can't help but smile fondly at him as he reassures her. "This time. You're not an Avenger, Matt."

Though she'd never stop him doing what he does, she'll keep worrying nonetheless. Too much of her life has become tied up with his. She doesn't want to know what it would become without him.
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-05 10:30 pm (UTC)(link)

Matt doesn't push, simply asks enough questions to let her know that if she'd like to talk about it, he's here to listen. He does like hearing stories about her younger life though. He likes to imagine her happy at one point. As for the nightmares, when he hears her wake up, he'll always go check on her, but like their conversations, he doesn't push her to talk about the nightmares. He knows that sometimes talking doesn't help. Sometimes, the only thing you can do is try to learn to live with those nightmares.

Her education can be taken care of (he'll be glad to help her when she's ready) and the crimes she committed were in a different life under different circumstances. Besides, if it ever comes down to it, she knows a good lawyer (or two). He also knows the names, voices, and smells of the people that were there betting on those fights. Some of them are very important people in the city of New York and it wouldn't do for it to get out that they were betting on such a thing. Matt feels certain it won't ever be an issue. Everything that she was isn't as important as who she is now and who she can be, who she works to be. He honestly believes that and he knows there's hope for Katniss' future. She really doesn't get to decide what kind of girl he's with; that's his decision and he does like her.

What she did isn't going to ever change his opinion of her. It's what she chooses to do now that she can choose that he's concerned with. It's not as if Matt hasn't done things in his life that he regrets. Besides, his circumstances were much better than hers have been. She's always got a place to stay and he won't stop helping her try to succeed here.

He did notice the second she raised her hand and he didn't shy away from the touch. He can almost hear the smile in her voice and the affection as well. It makes his heart beat a little harder, makes him a little breathless. It has been a long time since anyone has cared about him romantically. He swallows thickly, catching his breath. "No, but the Avengers aren't doing anything to clean up Hell's Kitchen. In fact, if I remember right, last time they just destroyed it. This city needs me."

stillplaying: ([serious] meant every word)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-05 11:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Where would she even begin talking? It had been hard enough admitting to him how she had gotten involved with the Games to begin with. She doesn't like admitting weakness; a trait that has helped her survive the past few years. But in order to keep him from turning her in, Katniss had to admit how she had gotten involved to begin with. She hadn't wanted to kill. Her sixteen year old self had just been dumb enough to think that Hell's Kitchen was looking warehouse staff. She should have been suspicious when they mentioned on-site housing. Even more suspicious when she was taken to the Games' doctor. But all she had been focused on was the money. For the most part, her employers had kept their words on that.

He's better off not knowing the rest of the details. How sick she had been after making her first kill. That moment she realized that she had become numb to death. Or being told that she could make extra by selling herself to patrons after big wins and actually agreeing to those conditions. Living with the nightmares, living with the memories, isn't easy. Sometimes she wonders if it's worth learning to live with these thoughts. It's why Katniss only tells Matt the good parts of her life. The things that she wants to remember.

Besides, Matt's given her so much already. More than he ever had to. He risked his secret identity with her. Katniss still doesn't understand why. People don't take chances on screw-ups like her. But Matt did. To ask him for more than what he's given would be wrong. She might have only been sixteen but she had been old enough to make her own decisions and live with the consequences. He doesn't need to see to her education. He doesn't need to act as her pro bono lawyer. Katniss already feels guilty enough about the jobs he finds her. She won't owe him any more than she already does.

How can he continue to think so highly of her? Most people wouldn't understand the life that she's lived. He comes close given his experiences as an orphan. But even then, there has to be a line drawn somewhere. She's half his age. She's made choices worse than nay Matt's ever decided upon. He shouldn't want her to succeed. He shouldn't want her at all. Katniss doesn't question his lack of dates, not when he's so busy with his law practice and alternative career. But she'd never suspect that it's because of her.

"I remember," she says with a frown, flattening her palm against his chest. His shirt feels warm and soft underneath her hand and it makes her want to rest her head against his chest instead of her hand. She resists, maintaining the distance between them on the couch. "Then you should get a partner. There are other people with abilities out there."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-05 11:47 pm (UTC)(link)

He can understand that, the inability to know where to begin. 'The beginning' is the simple answer, but it's not really so simple to do that, not when there's so much to tell and so much of it is difficult to tell. She had been desperate and naive. They'd offered to solve all her problems and she'd leaped before she'd really looked. There's no crime in that. The men that made her that offer are the ones to blame and they're the ones that Matt made sure were put away. They won't do that to others, not anymore.

The rest of the details won't make a difference. He's put the men who did that away. He remembers the ones that were betting and won't hesitate to blackmail them if necessary. Telling him the details would be for her and her alone. They won't change anything. They'll probably make him angry enough that there will be a dark part of him that wishes he'd killed the man in charge, but he didn't, and he's glad he didn't. As for what she owes him, it's nothing at all. He doesn't keep a running tally in his head; it doesn't work like that. He wants to help her. He wants her to get a better education and have a fair shot at life.

She doesn't see herself clearly, but then most people don't. She's a person worth saving, someone worth caring about. He may not understand her experiences, but he can sympathize with them and he thinks he knows her as a person. She is half his age, and that's what keeps him from moving closer to her or pulling her closer to him. Her hand is a searing weight on his chest and he can hear her heart beating a little faster. He keeps his hand over hers against his chest. It's a lightweight--she could move if she wanted to, that's what he tells himself-- but it's a weight he is very aware of. He knows how far away she is and wishes that she would move closer, wishes that she weren't half his age, wishes so many things that he dare not put into words.

"There are," he admits. "I don't want to put anyone else in danger. Besides, I'm not sure that there's anyone else I'd work well with."

stillplaying: ([serious] keep you safe)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-06 12:36 am (UTC)(link)
They've already discussed the beginning. Kind of. He's told her about the orphanage, she in turn told him about what it had been like to have a relatively normal childhood in Brooklyn. She told him about her life taking a bad turn and that stupid decision that led to where she is today. They've done the beginning. It's not an option to start with anymore. Where else can they begin? Daredevil has already saved the day. He's saved her and the countless other children she'll never have to kill now. And she's thanked him a number of times.

Maybe she hasn't thanked him enough? She'll have to contemplate that later on. Much later, when she's not doing her best to maintain a proper distance between them. Reminding herself that she's like a daughter to him and she needs to respect that, not attempt to convince him otherwise.

She remembers some of the people who had been involved in the underground fighting ring. Mostly, Katniss remembers the people directly in charge of her and the people who had provided her with all the money that's gone straight towards her sister's college savings. She'll never be able to forget any of them. And if she ever sees a single familiar face again, Katniss won't hesitate to kill any of them. Even those 'upstanding' citizens whose deaths would really get her in trouble. Matt probably has the better idea with blackmail. But all of this is further reason why she shouldn't drag Matt into her life any more than she already has.

Really, she should probably leave. Pack up her duffel bag and find someplace outside of New York City to live. There has to be something out there for an eighteen year old criminal, right? At least, something that won't get others in trouble. It's something that she's considered more than once. Leaving is easier to consider when she's alone. As soon as she sees Matt, she can't imagine leaving. Just like now.

"Then you need someone whose life is already in danger," she tells him as she begins to rub her thumb against his chest, unaware of what she's doing. This is something that she's contemplated for a while, as well. If Katniss can't bring herself to leave him, then maybe she should stick by his side far more often. "Hawkeye makes a different with a bow and no superpowers. Why can't I?"
preemptiveforgiveness: (Harder than it seems)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-06 06:13 pm (UTC)(link)
True enough. Maybe one day she'll want to fill in the gaps. She knows more of his story than he does hers, but he's okay with that. She's thanked him more than enough times. He doesn't want her to thank him. He wants her to take the second chance he gave her and make something of it. He wants her to have a better life, to be happy.

She doesn't have to thank him anymore. Really. She doesn't have to maintain a proper distance either. She's really not like a daughter to him, but he's trying to tell himself that she should be. Convince him, Katniss.

He won't involve her in the blackmail if he doesn't have to. He can't imagine that seeing any of those people again would be busy and that's only knowing half of what these people did to her. He wouldn't blame her for wanting to kill them, but it would ruin her life and he doesn't want that for her. He didn't save her so that she could end up in prison.

No, she shouldn't leave. It would crush Matt if she left. She's not a criminal. She's a girl who had no choices. He wants her in his life, in his apartment, no matter how complicated she makes his life.

She may be unaware, but he's completely aware of every movement, of the weight of her hand, the warmth of it. He's aware of the extra warmth produced by the slight friction of her thumb against his shirt. He takes a sharp breath, holding it a moment before releasing it. All of those super senses he's got, they include a sensitivity to touch. His sheets aren't silk because he's a spoiled rich boy. They're silk because everything else feels like sandpaper. Right now, all he can think about it how her hand would feel against his bare skin and he's really got to put those thoughts out of his head. He closes his eyes, focusing on blocking out the way she feels. He hopes that she simply thinks he's thinking over her proposal.

"Katniss," he says, his voice a little rougher, a little less controlled than usual. "I don't doubt that you could make a difference, that you will make a difference, but do you know what it would do to me if you got hurt?" Or worse. He can't even say worse.
stillplaying: ([serious] cautious)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-06 07:06 pm (UTC)(link)
Maybe. One day. When she feels confident that the middle of her story won't push him away. Or when she decides that she needs to push him away because being in Matt's life just makes it more dangerous than it already is. It's the reason that she's never gone home these past few months. And why she never tried to escape the Games before then. She refuses to put Prim in any danger. Despite all the resentment she feels towards her mother, she won't put Mrs. Everdeen in that situation either. Matt is much more capable of taking care of himself. So far, she hasn't been that much of a danger to him.

But she does have to thank him. No one does anything out of the goodness of their heart, not in their world. There are costs to everything. So far, Matt hasn't given any inclination of wanting to be thanked the way she would assume most men would want. So she's worked on repaying him by acting as his personal nurse and maid. She tends to his wounds and keeps the apartment nearly spotless. At first, she preferred to do the chores. Maintaining proper distance had seemed like a given. Now? Now she wishes he could've been more like those other men. If she were a little bit braver, she'd convince him in a heartbeat.

It's probably for the best that she doesn't know about the blackmail. Katniss doesn't trust herself in front of those people. Everything Matt's done for her would have been for nothing if she saw one of them again. Katniss wouldn't think twice. Besides, prison can't be that bad. Nothing can be as bad as the two years spent in the Games.

It would mean losing Matt though. And no longer providing an income for her family. Could she live with that? Maybe there's a way that she can seek vengeance without Matt - or anyone else - ever finding out. Then she wouldn't disappoint him by finding herself in jail.

Still relatively unaware of her own actions, she certainly doesn't notice his reaction to her caress. Seduction isn't something that she's skilled at. She had always been straight forward when she spent the night with others after a bout. As far as she concerned, it was like another fight. Assess the situation and do everything necessary to survive the hours that would follow. There was no need for seduction when sex had always been a guarantee. She continues to run her thumb against his shirt because it calms her. Kind of like a nervous tick of some sort. His shirt is silky beneath her skin and the heat of his body is a lovely contrast on her palm from the drafty loft. When her actions finally sink in, she assumes he doesn't push her away because he's being polite. And because she's distracted him with an argument that's become relatively routine for them.

"You'd find a new partner," she says simply. Her voice remains controlled. Practical. She does notice that slight roughness in his voice but assumes it's just because he has misplaced concern for her. "Because I'd prove to you that having a partner is more effective than fighting alone. We're all replaceable, Matt."
Edited 2016-03-06 19:06 (UTC)
preemptiveforgiveness: (What?)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-06 07:43 pm (UTC)(link)
Hopefully one day, she'll choose to tell him for the first reason and not the second. Unfortunately, because Matt is accustomed to people leaving him (orphan and all) it's easy for him to believe that she would leave because his life is too complicated. Even without the vigilante thing there's the blindness and the fact that he's a lawyer who does more pro-bono cases than he does paid cases. He makes enough, but he's never going to be rich. The only reason he can afford an apartment this spacious is because of that stupid digital billboard that sits right outside the window and lights the place up like it's near daylight in the middle of the night.

He really doesn't need a thanks, but he doesn't mind her treating his wounds and keeping the place clean. Of course, at some point he's going to worry that she only does those things because she feels like she has to. There have been enough things in Katniss' life that she's felt like she had to do. He doesn't want to add to that. If he'd been like those other men, he wouldn't be the person he is and she wouldn't care about him. She'd resent him instead. He doesn't want that either.

Probably best. Sometimes, he is bright about things like that.

Maybe one of these days she'll be comfortable enough with who she's become that she won't need to seek vengeance, at least not vengeance that results in death. He thinks going to church would be good for Katniss, confessing to his priest and that sort of thing, but he's certainly not going to push her to do that. She's always welcome when he goes to confession or mass.

Matt never, ever wants to have that sort of sex with her or anyone. That's not sex so much as it is manipulation, torture, a system of trade, blackmail and abuse. If when they have sex, it won't be straight forward at all, even if sex is a guarantee. The fact that it calms her is good. He can hear the way her heart slows a little, feel the way she relaxes and calms a bit. It emboldens him a little and allows him to entertain thoughts like maybe it wouldn't be taking advantage of her to kiss her. Of course, he automatically feels guilty about that, but he's Catholic. Guilt is almost a comforting feeling. All of his clothes are ridiculous soft because of the supersensitive skin thing.

Her words bring an immediate reaction. He tenses and shakes his head, sitting up abruptly. "No. Katniss. You're wrong," he turns, tucking one leg up on the couch, he reaches across the space to grab her arms with both hands. His touch is gentle. He scoots a little closer then tucks one hand up under her chin, tilting her face up to look at his. The only real space between them is his leg folded up on the couch. He can't see her, but he can sense her heartrate, her emotions, the heat of her skin and she can see the expression on his face. "Katniss, you are not replaceable to me. Not ever. Do you understand?" His voice carries all the passion and emotion he feels: love and admiration, a little bit of desperation. He needs her to hear him and believe him.
stillplaying: ([others] makeouts in the meadow)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-06 11:39 pm (UTC)(link)
Katniss doesn't care if he's rich or if he's poor. He makes enough money to be comfortable, more comfortable than the Everdeens were even before her father died. The vigilante thing doesn't bother her. Why should it? If he hadn't opted to be Daredevil, she'd still be in the underground. She'd still be spending her nights fighting to the death and then finding herself in some stranger's bed. Worse, if it had been the police that busted them, she would be in jail right now. He saved her because he's brave enough to fight injustice. How could that ever bother her?

Nor does she feel as if she has to do those things. He doesn't make her pay rent. He pays for most of their groceries. She has to contribute somehow. Anyway, it's not just that. How else is she ever going to fully thank him? He's not like those other men, or even like those other women. She loves him for that. Well, she loves him for that when she allows herself to love him. She loves him for how he defends anyone whose been wronged, even someone as awful as she is. Or how he doesn't let his disability stop him from doing anything. How could she ever resent him? It's more likely that he'd resent her.

Church had never been a part of her life before the Games. Her family was never religious and she never really saw the point of going to church or any kind of services. Katniss knows that it's a big part of Matt's life. He's offered to take her with him before. What good would it do? Clearly god doesn't care for her. Anyway, there has to be too much blood on her hands to ever be allowed in a church.

Of course, that's another problem, isn't it? Another reason why it's probably for the best that Matt thinks of her as a little sister or a daughter or something like that. She's figured out enough about him to know that he'd probably never be the kind of guy to willingly sleep with a prostitute. And while she refuses to think of herself as such, Katniss knows that to some, her actions outside of the arena could easily define her as such. Sex is a means to an end, a way to get some extra cash. All that matters is pleasing her partner, not herself. They'd only clash, wouldn't they? She shouldn't think about it. Resting her hand above his heart reassures her that he's alive and well and that in itself calms her. Katniss might not get along with most people but she's always needed someone in her life.

She startles when he suddenly sits up. Katniss moves her hand away from him as if she's been burned and takes a sharp intake of breath. She's not wrong. Everyone is replaceable. Just like anyone can be brought if the price is high enough. The past two years have taught her that much. She remains frozen on the couch as he she tucks his hand under her chin and forces her to look at him. He doesn't have his glasses on within his apartment and though he can't see anything, his eyes are beautiful. Katniss could easily stare in them forever. How hard would it be to close the space between them and kiss him? A real kiss, given cause she wants to and not because it's expected of her.

Her heart beats fast and she feels as if it's going to burst out of her chest. His words don't help. They just make her love him more. When was the last time anyone's told her this? Made her feel special, like she really mattered? At least two years, that last time she saw Prim. She doesn't agree with his words but Katniss doesn't have the heart to tell him that he's wrong. Instead, she gives in to her inhibitions and leans in to press her lips against his. The kiss is brief, almost over as soon as it begins. Katniss shakes her head quickly, looking panicked. "I shouldn't have done that."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-07 01:02 am (UTC)(link)
He's not the most logical thinker when it comes to romantic relationships. Somewhat recently, he'd put his heart out there on the line and Claire had left because it was all just too much to deal with. Of course, Matt had done nothing but bring danger and problems into Claire's normal, average life. He certainly hadn't saved her the way that he'd saved Katniss.

The only difference apartment wise is he sleeps on the couch at night while Katniss takes the bed so her paying rent isn't necessary. He likes the couch. It's comfortable and even before he shared his apartment with Katniss, he'd sleep on the couch occasionally. In any case, he likes the deal they have as long as she's alright with it. As for his disability, in all honesty, he "sees" more than most sighted people do. He just sees differently after the accident.

Church isn't for everybody and Matt understands that. It's somewhere he used to go with his father (the very church, the very priest). He won't push Katniss to come with him. He's quite certain that she won't burst into flame in any case if she walks into the church. In fact, he thinks Father Antram would like her. He's that sort of priest.

He wouldn't sleep with someone actively prostituting, but she's not doing it anymore. She's making her life different and better. That's what matters to him. The only thing stopping him from getting involved with her romantically is her age and the fear that she'll feel like she 'has' to have sex with him because of the things that he's done for her. Should they get into a romantic relationship, he has a lot to teach her, things that won't involve sex immediately, or even at all at first. They wouldn't clash, but they both might spend a few weeks frustrated because he'll insist on taking their time.

He hears the way she reacts: that sharp intake of breath, her heart rate jumping at the suddenness of his movements. She's completely wrong, which is something else he's got to teach her, something that will take a great deal of time. He doesn't wear his glasses in the apartment because she doesn't care that his eyes don't focus or that he never looks directly at her. It makes most people uncomfortable, hence the sunglasses. If it's something she wants, something that she knows isn't expected of her, he's in full support of her kissing him, no matter how wrong he thinks it is (or how many hail marys or lords prayer he's going to have to do for kissing her).

He's actually a little worried she's going to flee by the sound of her heart beat. His fingers tighten ever so slightly on her arm and he keeps his other hand tucked under her chin. He's expecting anything and everything except that kiss, that light press of her lips against his that is all too brief. He's at war with himself when she pulls away, torn between kissing her and speaking. Finally, he settles for asking quietly, roughly "Why shouldn't you have?"
stillplaying: ([others] maybe)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-07 03:25 am (UTC)(link)
She either thinks too much or too little. Not that Katniss has had any real experience with romantic relationships. More like none what-so-ever. She never had the time for childhood crushes and by the time she had become a teenager, her life had been ripped away from her. It's possible that she could be going about this all wrong. Dwelling too much on whether she's even capable of love, let alone worthy at it. Trying to figure out if Matt's comments and actions are that of a father or brother like figure or that of a friend turned lover. It's become her latest hobby when she can't sleep at night.

Really, Katniss thinks it should be the other way around. As the guest, she should have the couch and Matt should have his bed. He does more during the day (and night) than she does, anyway. But that's a failed argument on her end. She's tried multiple times. Matt has yet to agree.

Someday she'll go with him, when she's convinced that she won't burst into flames as soon as she enters the church. Right now, Katniss is convinced that it's a very real possibility. Just as she thinks that all the Hail Mary's in the world won't make up for her past actions. Father Antram would probably see right through her, just like Matt ought to.

No, she's not doing it anymore. Katniss never would have to begin with but the money offer had been too good. Still, she can't erase her past no matter how much she wants to. He'd still be sleeping with someone who used to engage in sex for money. She doesn't equate sex with love like he does. She doesn't understand half of the things he believes when it comes to love. More than that, she understands how love can destroy a person. She's seen it with her mother. Katniss has already made the mistake of falling in love with Matt. She would understand if he refused to do the same.

His eyes have never bothered her. Even if he's not looking directly at her, Katniss knows that he's paying attention to her. There's something in the way he holds himself that tells her that she holds his attention and nothing short of an unexpected emergency will change that. There's so much more to Matt than his eyes and maybe it shouldn't be, but Katniss finds it amazing to watch him fight. No one would ever know that he's blind. They'd never guess.

Although she wants to, Katniss doesn't flee. His hands keep her grounded, especially that hand on her chin. She wants those fingers to slip further up her face so that she can kiss each fingertip. She wants him to 'see' that look of adoration on her face through touch. More than that, Katniss wants to kiss him again. She takes a couple of deep breaths but her heart keeps beating rapidly. She can hear it. Katniss can only imagine how loud it must be to Matt.

"Because it's me," she whispers, her mouth dry and her words hoarse. She's an idiot, one screwing everything up between them. Yet she keeps her head near his, foreheads almost touching and breaths almost mingling. "I'm me and you're you. I shouldn't have done that."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-07 04:17 am (UTC)(link)
She's definitely worthy of love and Matt has no doubt that she's capable of love. She cares about him, he knows that even if he doesn't know the extent of her feelings. She loves her sister. She is capable. He tries to keep his actions those of a brother or a father, but he knows that they're not always as fatherly or brotherly as they should be.

She'd never be able to sleep in the brightness and it doesn't matter to him.

There's nothing to see through, but Matt knows that she won't believe that. It's something that she has to learn on her own and that'll probably take time as well.

So much of what Matt believes is theory alone or maybe it's just hope. Either way, he hasn't given up on love. He's not bitter about it, just wary. He's aware of how much love can hurt, but he's still hopeful that one day he'll find a love that doesn't hurt.

He's paying attention to her regardless of where he's 'looking'. He's listening to her heart and her breathing, to her emotions. His entire being is focused on her right now. He hopes that no one knows he's blind to watch him fight. It's an advantage he has and it helps to keep his secret identity secret. He'll help her learn to fight if she'd like. In fact, if she's persistent about being his partner, it will be one of his conditions. She's good, but she's going to have to learn a more sophisticated, controlled sort of combat because he wants her to be as safe as possible.

He does use that method to 'see' someone provided he knows that someone is going to stay in his life. He hasn't done that with Katniss yet simply because it's intimate in a way and she reminds him of a wild animal, apt to shy at any time. He wants to kiss her again just as much, but he has to know that she wants him to kiss her. As for her heart, if he focuses on it, it sounds like the beat of a drum, loud and fast.

He swallows hard, listening to the infliction in her words, the tone of her voice, sensing her emotions and listening to her heart beating. He's listening to everything else so hard that her words are almost background noise. He moves his hand from beneath her chin slightly, his thumb sliding up to rest against her lips, to stop her words. "If I'm ever out of line, if I ever do anything you don't want me to do or if I ever make you uncomfortable, all you have to do is say something. It won't change anything. You'll still have a place to live; we'll still be friends. I'll still help you."

He lets his thumb slip down just below her lower lip before he slides his hand back along her jaw to her neck, fingertips and thumb cradling her face as he dips his head and kisses her. It's a soft kiss, gentle, but far from brief or chaste.
stillplaying: ([others] another kind of hunger)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-07 05:42 am (UTC)(link)
No she isn't. She's not worthy. But Katniss is selfish. Her sister still loves her because Prim doesn't know the truth. She doesn't know how Katniss had been providing for her these past two years. Matt knows the truth. He seems to like her well enough regardless. She'd never use love to describe the way he feels for her but she's definitely willing to accept that he's fond of her on some level. It's hard to comprehend.

Overall, her self-esteem has never been all that high. The past two years have only served to knock it down further. In some ways, she had been more of an object than a person to these people. It hadn't taken long for Katniss to generally agree with the assessment. Why would anyone love an object? There's a lot that she has to learn. Loving herself, not just loving others, is probably on the top of that list.

She knows how his abilities work. They still amaze her. They also make her envious. Though she holds out no hope, she wouldn't mind powers like his. More Inhumans are cropping up every day. Why not her? But that's not how these things work. Her fighting abilities are no where as refined as his. She learned how to fight in a desperate attempt not to die. Her skills are underhanded and creative but if it meant that she could protect Matt while he works his other job, she'd be willing to improve.

Comparing her to a wild animal isn't all that far off the mark. She had been very skittish when she first approached him. Ready to bolt the second he showed an inclination to hand her over to the police. There have been many days since where she's acted much the same. But she wouldn't run if he touched her or even if he kissed her. Her heart will continue to race but the fear would be worth it. At least that's what she tells herself.

The second his thumb slides near her lips, she swallows hard. Her eyes close and despite knowing that it's meant to silence her protests, she tilts her head enough to capture the tip of her thumb between her lips. She's being an idiot again, A stupid, reckless idiot. But there's that need to please him budding within her. He's closer than he's ever been, than anyone's been since being freed of the Games, and it makes her want. Though he tries to explain something to her, Katniss only draws a break. What could he ever make her do that she wouldn't want? Is he talking about what she's doing now? The way she's coming on to him even though he's given no inclination of wanting this kind of attention from her?

She's ready to ask or, even better, be smart and back away entirely, when his grip on her shifts and she finds his lips back on hers. The kiss has to be the gentlest that she's ever experienced and for a few seconds, Katniss isn't certain what to do. Then the same instincts she relied on in the past kick in and she amps up the kiss. This time, her kiss lasts more than a second. And it's far from the gentleness of his kiss. She crushes her lips to his and slips her tongue into his mouth. But it remains brief when fear gets the better of her.

"Father's don't kiss their daughters like this," she murmurs as she struggles to catch her breath. "Same with brothers and their sisters."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-07 08:08 pm (UTC)(link)

She can keep telling herself that, but Matt hopes that eventually she'll realize that she is. In any case, at least she's selfish enough not to push everyone and everything away. Matt wouldn't even call it selfish; he'd call it a survival instinct and Katniss has that in spades, which isn't a bad thing. People aren't made to exist in a vacuum, at least not most of them. He wouldn't call what he feels for Katniss love, not yet, at least not the romantic sort, but he cares about her a great deal. He's interested in her romantically and he suspects that it could easily turn to him falling in love with her.

They'll have to work on that, but a great deal of it will simply come in time. She needs to be able to see herself as a person again, a person worthy of good things. If he thought she'd talk to a professional, he'd find someone for her to talk to. It might be something he addresses with her at some point. He'd had to talk to an endless string of professionals after his father had died and at first he'd been so angry about it, but over time it had helped.

No, that's not really how it works and even if she did get into an accident with something radioactive the way he had, there's no guarantee it would give her any abilities, but he can help make her very capable without any abilities. As she'd pointed out, Hawkeye manages just fine. So does Black Widow. Besides, he thinks she'll end up liking training. It's a good way to work out frustrations, anger and stress. Fighting is different when it's not a life or death situation.

Her heart racing isn't a bad thing, but the fear is. He doesn't want her to ever be afraid of him. This place is supposed to be safe for her.

He swallows hard when she kisses the tip of his thumb. His heart is racing, hammering hard in his chest even if she can't hear it. He doesn't want her to want to please him, not right now. That can come later. He'd rather that selfish streak in her arise and she please herself. She's not stupid or reckless. This won't endanger her in any way regardless of where things between them go from here. That's why he felt the need to say those words. He wants her to know that her shelter, her food, his help isn't dependent on what happens in the next few moments. He is talking about this moment right now, but obviously not in the way she thinks he is. This is something he wants (has wanted for a few weeks), but he's denied himself because he was/is afraid that it'll be unwanted or that's not how she thinks of him.

The kiss gets a great deal more heated than Matt had intended and that's due to Katniss' reaction. He moves a hand to the small of her back, tugging her closer so that she's practically in his lap. If this is something they're going to explore, he's definitely going to want to slow things down for her sake because she deserves a sweet, romantic relationship rather than something hurried and heated and over before it can really be enjoyed. However, at the moment he's definitely not thinking of slowing anything down. In fact, the things that he's thinking about really shouldn't be voiced. It's been a long time since he's been with anyone and that makes it all the more difficult to think about slowing down or taking his time.

Of course, her next words are like cold water on the whole situation. He takes a sharp breath, guilt and shame washing over him. He swallows thickly and clears his throat. "I--I apologize. I didn't realize--I guess I read the situation wrong. I thought this was..." he takes another sharp breath. "I thought this was what you wanted." He starts to move his hands, to lean back away from her. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, Katniss."

He wants to say that he doesn't think of her like a daughter or a sister, but he'd rather not put that out there if she thinks of him that way.

stillplaying: ([confusion] must've heard wrong)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-07 11:06 pm (UTC)(link)
She will keep telling herself that. It'll probably be a long time before Katniss is convinced otherwise. Time with Matt has started to mend the emotional scars that comprise so much of her psyche. As far as Katniss is concerned, Matt doesn't owe her anything anymore. His responsibilities to her ended as soon as Daredevil put an end to the Games. He didn't have to take her in or trust her with his secret. But he had and for the first time in a long time, she had felt a spark of emotion that she would have sworn was dead. Though she tries not to think too much about it, Katniss had fallen for Matt that night he took her home to his loft. She loves him even though she doesn't want to acknowledge that.

He's the first person in a long time not to see her as an object, or to treat her as one. It's still hard to think of herself as a person, let alone a worthy one. But Matt's also right in thinking that sending her to a professional would be futile. She'd sit there in silence, staring at the shrink much as she stared at the coffee shop patrons who'd ask dumb questions (well, up until she was fired). It'd be much the same with Matt's priest. The past two years of her life have taught her how easily trust and promises are broken. Why should she trust any of them, professional or priest, not to rat her out to the cops? She trusts Matt but only because Matt had extended that trust to her first.

For Katniss, fighting has only ever been a life or death situation. There had been a time before her father died when she had engaged in sport. Archery had been there shared hobby and training a regular occurrence in the Everdeen household. She had even had the naïve aspirations of a little girl to someday make it to the Olympics. It hadn't lasted. Even in the fights she had been forced to lose, Katniss still fought as if her life depended on it. Those would almost always end in unconsciousness. She'd do anything to avoid that.

Almost everything about her life then had been about survival. It remains that way now. She can feel his heart racing underneath the palm that still rests flat on his chest. She recognizes the tempo as two possible things: nerves or arousal. She picks arousal because all of her kisses have always been with a partner interested in her. It's easier to know how to react to that than to think Matt Murdock might reject her advances. Besides, she is being selfish in her eyes. She doesn't want to get kicked out of the apartment. She doesn't want to lose Matt. Katniss just wants to survive. It's why his pleasure comes before her own. She doesn't have to please herself, or even be pleased with her actions. She just needs to make it until the next day.

And it seems to work. He responds in kind to the heated kiss and she lets him close the distance between them on the couch. She's pliable in his hands; if he had wanted to lift her on to his lap rather than seat her right beside him, she wouldn't fight. Katniss doesn't know how, not in this kind of scenario. Everything has always been hurried and heated and never anything that she enjoyed, even with repeat customers. There's nothing wrong with that. At least, she doesn't think that there should be much wrong with that. It had been her choice. And Katniss is stubborn enough to fully own her faults and mistakes rather than blame others. This though? The way Matt kisses her in return? It sparks something inside of her much like his trust had the night they met. She could see herself enjoying this. If Matt wanted to continue.

Which, clearly, he doesn't. At least that's what Katniss thinks at first. Her eyes narrow as she looks at him, frowning at that sharp breath and the clearing of his throat and the way he stumbles over his words. Matt is a lawyer. He's one of the most articulate people that she's ever met. This isn't Matt. And for a good few seconds following his apology, Katniss just sits there in confusion. Then it sinks in and she's left even more confused. She had thought she was good at reading situations. She had to be, hadn't she? In order to live through that nightmare? How could she possibly be wrong?

But she had been. She had been very wrong. It comes as a shock to her and leaves her grasping for words to say aloud. It would be so easy to blurt out the obvious - I love you - but she's too afraid. In fact, she doesn't know what to say at all. So she retreats back to actions, this time being the one to grab his waist to keep him from retreating back any further. Her other hand goes straight to his crotch, rubbing at the bulge forming there the way she had learned early into her life in the Games.

"You want me," she finally utters before picking up the kiss right where she left off, still feeling just as surprised as she had moments ago. But she's determined to show him that this is mutual. And words are too terrifying. She's already messed up with words once. So she bites his lower lip teasingly before darting her tongue out to soothe the sting. "I'm not uncomfortable."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-08 12:30 am (UTC)(link)

He doesn't do the things he does for her now because he feels he has a responsibility to her. He does them because he wants to help her, he likes her and he wants her to have a chance at a better life. She got dealt a very bad hand at a young age and he wants to help her make something better. More than that, he wants to see her happy because he does like her.

And in that case, he's happy to listen, to let her talk to him about whatever she wants to talk about. Maybe at some point, he'll push a little, but for the most part he lets her decide what she talks about and when. Unfortunately, she's right. Too often promises and trust are things that are broken, but Matt is going to try to make sure that both of those stay whole between the two of them. It's not as if he's got that many people he trusts either, more than Katniss, but not an overabundance and he hopes with time she'll come to trust Foggy and Karen as well, even Father Antram so that if she needs him and can't get a hold of him, she has other people to turn to.

That's why, for at least a little while, he'll try to make sparring with him fun. He'll try to make teaching her and learning something fun. When they're out at night hunting someone, it's serious, but training doesn't have to be, not like that. Really, he wants Katniss to learn that not everything is about survival. Life holds so much more than that. There's a big difference between surviving and living. He hopes that one day she'll learn to live rather than just survive.

She's not wrong about the reason his heart is beating so fast and so hard. She is wrong about being kicked out of the apartment. This isn't ever going to be connected to her living here and that's what Matt has to stress to her so that she understands. She doesn't have to have sex with him or anyone else in order to live here. This is her home now and he's her friend. She's not going to lose him anymore than she's going to lose a place to stay.

Oh, it's definitely working. he's responding to her in every way. He doesn't pick her up or move her closer, that's not what this is about. Ths is just a kiss and that's all it's going to be for the moment because of all of Katniss' past issues and her thoughts on survival. No, there's nothing wrong with what she did if it had been her choice. The fault lie with the other people, the ones who had taken advantage of her and knowing that she couldn't or wouldn't turn them away or ask them to stop. She should always enjoy physical intimacy, that's what makes it so fantastic.

No, he does want to continue this eventually and he's stumbling over his words because this is important, not to mention the blood isn't exactly rushing to his brain. Really, it's like they're talking about two different things and neither of them have enough information to really understand the other one. He can sense the confusion coming off her in waves and he knows that he's made a mess of all of this.

He stops moving away when she wraps an arm around him. She's even closer now and that seems to be a good thing, then she's rubbing her hand against him and he's gasping out loud. He's shocked at first, too shocked to move, but after a moment he grabs her wrist, pulling her hand up and holding it against his chest. His breath is coming in pants and his heart is still going crazy. "Wait," he tells her, giving himself a chance to put his thoughts together as much as anything. He tries to sort out her words and her actions, everything she's been telling him in both ways up until this point. He returns the kiss, still not giving the impression that this is anything but mutual. He tangles his other hand up in her hair in an effort to hold her there, to make sure she hears him out. "Katniss, I don't think of you like a daughter or a sister. I know I probably should because of the difference in our ages, but you're right: I do want you," he pauses, drawing a deep breath, trying to gauge her reaction to his words. "It's important that you want me too," he tells her in a quieter voice.

stillplaying: ([others] maybe)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-08 02:13 am (UTC)(link)
Other people were dealt bad hands at young ages and none of them are residing in this apartment right now. Besides, she made her choices. And it's because of those choices that she's where she is today. That she's lived through such crappy events. She won't blame the hand that she dealt. Just like she won't blame anyone but herself. He has to know that by now. Not that any of that helps her in understanding Matt's actions. She might not ever. At least until she learns that she is the kind of person that Matt can love.

To this day, she still prefers to hide in the bedroom or leave the apartment when Foggy or Karen - or anyone really - come over. Mostly, she doesn't think that Matt wants her to get to know his friends so well. She sees herself as some dirty little secret that ought to be hidden from decent people. Or like the pet that'll only get in the way. She's not nearly as smart as them. They've both led normal lives. High school, college. Normal relationships and normal jobs. Why would they want to spend time with an uneducated murderer? Why would Matt for that matter?

Though that latter question is starting to make sense. That Matt is attracted to her answers a lot. Why he keeps her around. Why he wants her to be happy. Why he spends this much time with her. Maybe he's just been waiting for her to cover from the wounds she had sustained in her last fight, the one that Daredevil had crashed. She had attacked him then, thinking that he was just part of the show. It will be good to learn from him but having fun? Katniss doesn't care if she has fun. She just wants him to make it home in one piece. She just wants him to be happy, especially with her.

She still wouldn't blame him if he changes his mind. If he decides that she belongs elsewhere, specifically an elsewhere that's far from Hell's Kitchen and him. This might be one of those things that'll take as much time as building her self-worth. Or how to live rather than just survive. As time passes, Katniss might come to realize that there's very little she can do to get herself kicked out.

But it's not going to stop her from wanting to please him. Not right now, anyway. He's responding and to Katniss, that signals that she ought to further his enjoyment. It's what her customers wanted. Why should it be any different with Matt? Besides, there is a difference this time. More than just a lack of monetary transaction involved. Katniss wants to do this. She wants to make him happy because his happiness means everything to her, whether she wants it to or not. That makes it fantastic enough, doesn't it?

Katniss is more than aware that the blood isn't rushing to his brain. If it were, she wouldn't be doing a good enough job right now. She's also not really doing her best to understand what he has to say right now. Katniss is latching on to the one thing that she understands when it comes to relationships. She knows sex. Anything else is just a puzzle to her. There's nothing else Matt has to clarify. His body's reactions speak volumes.

But he pulls her hand away anyway and though he doesn't mean to hurt her by doing so, it does hurt. For the first time in her life, Katniss doesn't feel ashamed by or numb to the sounds she elicits from him. She loves every crazy beat of his heart, every gasp, every second that he becomes harder beneath her hand. Because of her hand. He has no reason to move her hand away. He has no reason to stop kissing her in exchange for more talk. Especially when the kiss says the exact opposite of what the hand of her wrist says. The same with that hand in her hair. Everything he's saying, everything else he's doing says he wants her. Then why did he move her hand away?

He wouldn't be the oldest person she's had sex with. She never would have considered the difference in their ages if not for the way he seemed to act around her. Like he considered her a kid. Someone to be protected and cared for. Just like a father figure or an older sibling. Clearly that's not it at all. So she made a mistake. She misread the situation between them. Can't he see that she's trying to make up for it now?

"I do," she insists, lips brushing his as she talks. Her mind's made up; Katniss wants him to gasp again. So she slides her free hand from his waist downward. She liked hearing him gasp. Doesn't he get that? It's not like it was before. This is different and the difference intrigues her. Talking is hard. Giving in to something that she's become good at isn't. He's paid her with a place to live and more than one job opportunity. Now she can at least earn that pay. And for once, it doesn't seem so bad. She presses her palm against his crotch and begins caressing him all over again. "I want you," Katniss whispers, her voice strangely husky to her own ears. "Tell me what you want, Matt."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-08 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
Well, no, which ought to make her feel special. Honestly, when he'd first allowed Katniss to stay here, he'd had no idea what to do with her. He hadn't intended for it to be permanent. He'd thought she surely had some place to go, someone who missed her. A few days became longer and now he doesn't even question her living here. She belongs here. It's a good thing to take responsibility for her actions and her choices, but she also needs to realize that there are some things that happened that were not her fault or her responsibility. It'll be a long road and Matt is aware of that.

Which is why he really needs to get her out more. She's far from a dirty, little secret. He talks to Karen and Foggy every day about Katniss and how she's doing or something she said the night before etc and so on. He simply hasn't wanted to push her out of her comfort zone so most of the time they stick to having delivery in the apartment.

That was not the point he was trying to make. He simply wanted her to know that he is attracted to her. That isn't why he keeps her around or why he wants her to be happy. He likes who she is as a person. On those nights that she lets her guard down, she's funny and smart, sarcastic and even charming.

At least he can understand that she wants him home in one piece and happy with him. He feels the same way about her, but he wants so much more for her than she wants for herself and it has nothing to do with his attraction to her.

He's not going to change his mind about wanting her here. He wouldn't have let her stay this long if he was. Though, he's got his own insecurities to work through so it's understandable that she's got hers. If they get into a romantic relationship, he will forever worry that this is too much for her, this being anything and everything in his life.

He's not one of her customers and this isn't an exchange of payment and services. He doesn't want to be treated like it is; he doesn't want her to feel like it is. It's important to him that she's happy and that she's pleased, that the desire here is mutual. Not quite fantastic enough.

It's not a job. This should be the beginning to something. Really, they're just too different in their opinions of what this should mean and be. It would be so easy to give himself over to the want and need that his body is screaming for right now, but he would feel horrible about himself later and there would be more need to talk and explain and make Katniss understand that this is different.

Hurting her wasn't his point. Explaining everything that he's feeling and everything that he wants this to be and making sure that Katniss is on the same page as him is important. Consent is such a multi-layered thing and he doesn't want there to be any gray areas between them where this is concerned. He knows he's giving her mixed signals and in part that's on purpose. He wants her to be aware that he wants her. There should be no questions about that. The confusion and the blurred lines lie in that he wants to make sure she understands this comes with no strings attached, that she wants him just as much.

That...doesn't help. At all. She's got nothing to make up for. HIs feelings for her have evolved over the time she's been here.

That's the problem. He doesn't get that this is different. Talking is hard, but it's important. He really hates that word paid. HE doesn't want her to ever think about him paying her or her earning her keep. 'Not so bad' isn't good enough. She presses against him and he responds, swallowing hard, eyes closing and lashes fluttering as he bites back a groan. After a moment, he tugs her into his lap. "First of all, slow down," he tells her, leaning in to press his lips against her collarbone. "I'm not going anywhere and neither are you."
stillplaying: ([action] giving in)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-08 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
Katniss hadn't attended for this arrangement to be permanent either. She had meant to slip out after a couple of days, as soon as she had felt healthy enough to be able to stand on her own two feet. She couldn't afford letting people in her life, let alone people who made her actually feel things. But leaving proved to be harder. She wanted to be around a man who trusted her, and possibly seemed to like her. He never forced her to leave and Katniss did her best not to give him a reason.

Of course, she doesn't know how often he talks about her. When Matt leaves to go to work each morning, she leaves to go to her latest job. If she runs into someone he knows during the day, she ducks her head and pretends not to see them. Word has yet to get back to her. That's okay. Knowing that he talks about her so often would just make her all the more uncomfortable. Pleased and flattered but utterly embarrassed. She needs to be pushed out of her comfort zone more often.

He shouldn't want those other things for her. Her life is already a lot better than it had been before she had met him. What else does she need in her life? Katniss has a real home to live in and someone, it turns out, interested in her. Someone she loves. That's enough, isn't it?

He has to remember who she is, where she came from. Though sometimes Katniss wishes her life could be normal, it turned out not to be. She's not the only one; the same can be said of most of the prominent victors within the Games. But compared to a lot of New Yorkers, her life is unique. She's killed more children than years she's been alive. she's sure that she's sold herself to just as many. And she's been in love with him almost since the day they met. Dating Daredevil doesn't seem like too much.

It's not that Katniss sees this as a job. Or that she sees him as one of her customers. Not fully. But there is that part of her that recognizes this as payback for everything that he's given her. And an even larger part that just doesn't know how to go about sex in any other manner. Besides, getting him off with her hands (or her mouth; she hasn't decided yet) is just the start. They have the whole night for him to enjoy her. More than that. She doesn't want to go anywhere and she'd do whatever he'd ask anyway. He should give himself over to that want and need. Honestly, Katniss can't think of anything better.

She had given him her consent the second that she had kissed him. And as far as she's concerned, he's given his consent in return by kissing her back. Can't it stay that simple? All this talking just makes everything confusing. Katniss prefers simple in her life. Greatly prefers it.

But not as much as she prefers this. He responds as nicely to her as he had at first and it causes a shiver to go down her spine. She's kept quiet about that part of her past on purpose. Bad enough he knows about all the murders. Katniss doesn't want him to know about everything else that she's done for money. She might be giving herself away but it's all she knows when it comes to sex. And to be honest, she's too distracted actually enjoying herself to even care.

"I like it when you make those noises," she insists, straddling and grinding herself against him as soon as he moves her into his lap. Her eyes flutter closed when he kisses her collarbone and for once, she doesn't have to fake the moan that escapes her lips. It's unexpected and that makes her smile. She presses a kiss against his jaw before nipping at the bone. "Let me make you feel good. Trust me, Matt?"
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

You saw nothing!

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-08 05:29 am (UTC)(link)
It's become comfortable to have her there and Matt never realized how nice it was to have someone to come home to until Katniss was there. He never realized how nice it was to have someone to share his day with. He doesn't want her to ever leave and that's true whether she cleans the house or anything else else.

He'll set about doing that, taking her on dates and inviting her to nights out with Karen and Foggy. They're all three a part of his life now and he'd like for them all to get along.

She doesn't get to tell him what he should and shouldn't want. Of course, that's hypocritical since he's telling her what he wants for her. He just wants her to be happy and healthy.

He does remember and he hates that he hadn't been able to save her before. He feels guilty about it. He's been the daredevil for a whole year before he'd saved her, longer really and he hadn't known about the Games until a few months ago. Maybe it's because he remembers where she came from and who she is that he wants so much for her. He wants her life now to make up for the life she'd had. As for his insecurities, those will fade over time, just as her issues will fade over time.

This is why they need to actually talk more. He wants to show her how to have sex another way, to make it more mutual. She should enjoy him just as much as he enjoys her.

He's not accustomed to anything being that simple.

He can't help his response to her, and he doesn't want to. He doesn't need to know every little thing about her past. He just needs enough to know where she's coming from, to understand her. Enjoying herself is good. That's a definite start in the right direction.

"I'll keep that in mind," he tells her in a husky whisper. She gets another groan out of him when she grinds herself against him. He swallows hard and one hand goes to span her waist. That moan spurs him on and makes him feel a lot better about this whole thing. "I like the way your skin tastes," he tells her, kissing her neck and nipping lightly at the skin. The way she kiss his jaw feels good and his hand on her waist squeezes a bit tighter. "Only if you let me make you feel good too," he whispers against her skin.

Saw what?

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Re: Saw what?

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