hominidae: (just jenny)
Jenny ([personal profile] hominidae) wrote2016-01-15 09:12 pm
Entry tags:

Open RP post!

? Pick one of my characters (see below) OR drop any character of yours in and get a random choice.
? Use RNG and enter 1-14 for a scene; roll again for specifics.
? Or cheat and just pick something.
? You can also just throw a picture, quote, or whatever kind of prompt you want.
? OPTIONAL: combine a bunch of memes and scenarios and go nuts.
? NOT optional: HAVE ALL THE FUN OR ELSE.


MUSE LIST



I. BED INVADERS
A. Decide you know this person! (Cast mate, previous CR, etc.)
1. WAKE THEM UP. You don't care how friendly you are to the person in your bed; they need to get up.
2. PRANK! Oh, this has just got to stop. They need to be punished. But how?
3. CAN'T BEAT 'EM, JOIN 'EM. Push 'em over & snuggle up. You're too tired to deal with this craziness right now. Or sleep on your couch.
4. LET THEM SLEEP. Whatever. It's noon. They're asleep and you've got things to do. Regard them or disregard them.


B. Decide you have NO CLUE who is person is! (No CR, cast mates who have never met, cross-canon, etc.)
5. SCREAM 'OMGWTFBBQ GET UP!' Really. Default action going on here.
6. PRANK! What a better way for you to remember this moment of meeting than by painting a mustachio on your new 'friend's' face? (Remember, it's your bed. Be wise what you do.)
7. GENTLY AWAKEN THEM. Oh, the poor dears! They must be exhausted, but they can't stay here. Be nice, even if it isn't IC for your character. This is what you get for rolling. Shake them up quietly. Or re-roll.
8. GET TO KNOW THEM NON-BIBLICALLY. Well, they're asleep. But they left their wallet, important work, or identification out (no matter how OOC it may be)! Let's see who's REALLY sleeping in your bed. (Use your own judgment on what you find. AS a suggestion, have the most they find is the sleeper's name and maybe place of work.)
9. TIE 'EM UP. FUNCTIONAL typing up. Not kinky, no matter what the other party might think. Let them continue their blissful moment of rest. They'll answer questions later and you'll be safe and sound.


C. Decide - I do what I want




II. ROAD TRIP
1. BREAK DOWN. Oh snap. Your car decided to break down out in the middle of nowhere. WHAT DO? Is that Leather-face? Will this be "Children of the Corn"?
2. HITCHHIKERS? Is this even a good idea? Threads may also have a third participant. Go wild.
3. WHAT THE FUCK DID I JUST HIT? Dude, I hear deer mess up cars... Or I think that was a deer...
4. DON'T MAKE ME TURN THIS CAR AROUND. Alas. You're the parent or disgruntled friend who has had it up to here with all the fighting in the back. This thread may also have a third or even fourth participant, if you can wing it.
5. OMG, I WANT TO TAKE A PICTURE OF THIS LANDMARK! No, no, and no. You tell that person that they're going to be driven around and they're going to like it.
6. THE GREAT ESCAPE. Either dinosaurs or the moth-man is chasing you. Don't stop now.
7. MAKE OUT. For whatever reason, the person you're traveling with in the car. You would love to make out with them and then some.




III. CUDDLES

1. SWEET DREAMS. It's been a long day and all you want to do is sleep or just rest your eyes for a bit. Hopefully whoever is close by doesn't mind if you use them as a blanket.
2. STORMY WEATHER. The heavy rain, thunder, and lightning won't be letting up anytime soon. Luckily, it's the perfect weather to stay indoors and snuggle up close and keep warm.
3. SLOW DANCE. It's the end of a party, or maybe it's only the two of you, but the tempo is slow and the lights are low. Let your dance partner take the weight and just sway.
4. SURPRISE ATTACK. Time to invade someone's personal space. Are they working too much and need a distraction? Maybe you just wanted to brighten their day. Either way, they won't see it coming.
5. MOVIE NIGHT. It can be on the sofa or in a darkened theater, but you've got your popcorn and someone to settle against during your favorite movie.
6. I LOVE YOU, MAN. It's totally platonic, really. You're just very good friends, no matter what people like to think. But you just love your friend so much you want to hug them, whether they like it or not.
7. JEEPERS CREEPERS. Welp. You were just frightened. Was it a spider in the washroom, a ghost in the attic, a bad dream? Either way, you're looking for someone to cling to right now, and who better than that person right there?
8. HURT AND COMFORT. Whether you're sick in bed, just been dumped, or suffered a traumatic event, you need someone to wrap their arms around you and make everything go away.
9. SUNDAY MORNING. Maybe you just had a wild night. Maybe there's just not enough space at your place and you need to share your bed. Or maybe you just got really tired and someone else happened to be there. Doesn't matter because now the person with you looks way more comfortable than any blanket or pillow. Drape to your heart's content.
10. MOMENT AFTER. You just had incredible, vigorous sex and if you weren't a cuddler before, you are now. You're probably too exhausted to do anything else anyway. Just enjoy the moment.
11. PLAYER'S CHOICE. Pick one or make up your own!




IV. HURT/COMFORT
1. INJURY. You've been injured. Broken bones or bleeding out or maybe just a tiny little paper-cut. The choice is yours.
2. SICKNESS. You're sick and laid up in bed, at home or in a hospital. The severity is up to you.
3. FEAR/ANXIETY. Something is happening and you're scared beyond belief.
4. LOSS OF SENSES. Sight, touch, taste, hearing, smell, etc. You've lost some important sense or ability and now you're left to deal with it.
5. DESPAIR. Nothing is good or right anymore and you can't shake the depression. Maybe that friend of yours can help though.
6. MAKE UP. Fight or break up, it's time to make up.
7. RESCUED. You've just been held captive and/or tortured for however long and finally, someone has come to the rescue.
8. BAD ROMANCE. Fight, cheat on, abuse, whatever the case is, someone else can clearly see you need comfort from someone who isn't your terrible lover tonight.
9. LOSS. You've experienced a loss of some kind and need help getting through it.




V. FIGHT
1. FISTFIGHT. Straight-up, unfussy, no-holds-barred face punching. Clearly you're emotionally invested in this argument. Or maybe you want some stress relief.
2. BAR FIGHT. Someone's had one too many drinks. Curses are being slurred, bottles are being smashed. Just don't be surprised if you get thrown out.
3. VERBAL. A caustic, intellectual battle of wits? Or just immature playground insults? Either way, the fighting here isn't physical; sticks and stones can break your bones, but we'll see if words can hurt you...
4. WEAPONRY. Fencing practice or a real sword fight? Paintball or battlefield gunfight? The only limits are your imagination (and the extents of human military engineering, of course)!
5. SPARRING. Maybe you're a streetwise punk teaching the new kid on the block the ropes of self-defense. Or perhaps you just want to get some practice in before your karate exam.
6. SEXY. That collar-grabbing led to a kiss, that knee stayed in a place a little too long, those gazes got a little intense... There's heavy breathing here, but it might not be because you've been exerting yourself.
7. DUEL. You insulted the wrong person. Or got caught cheating at cards. A duel, sir, a duel! The glvoes are off (and slapping you) and it's pistols at dawn.
8. COMPETITIVE. Boxing, wrestling, martial arts, the possibilities are endless. Just remember: the first rule of Fight Club...
9. OTHER. Combine any of the above, or make up your own!




VI. BODY HORROR
1. WATER-DWELLING. You've grown gills, or your skin is turning translucent, or you're sprouting fins, or maybe you're outright turning into some form of sea life. It doesn't matter what you're turning into - what does matter is taht you're slowly losing the ability to breathe air, and there's no water in sight.
2. ANIMAL. Something bit you, and you're turning into an animal. Your bones lengthen or perhaps shrink, break, twist, and reform. Your teeth lengthen or shorten. And above all, you feel your instincts being overridden. Your senses sharpen; you notice smells you never did before. Your vision becomes more sensitive to movement. If you're a predator? Man, these people look mighty tasty. Prey? OH GOD. EVERYTHING IS TERRIFYING. Lizard? Enjoy your new inability to regulate body temperature. Bird? Have fun with the whole beak and hollowing bones. And don't get us started on insects and arachnids.
3. PARASITIC. Something's inside you, and it's changing you from within, chewing up your insides and altering your thoughts. You're not sure how much longer you're going to be you, and when the parasite's going to take over completely...
4. DEMONIC. You've been meddling with dark powers beyond the ken of mortal man, and it seems you've accidentally sold your soul. Will you be the traditional kind of demon, horns and hooves, or something far more terrifying and ineffable?
5. UNDEAD. No doubt about it, you're dying. But as you are, something's been altered in you. Maybe you're becoming a vampire - and not the fun kind either; we're talking ugly, ravenous, and mad. Maybe you're a zombie, or a ghoul, and human flesh looks mighty tasty. Or maybe you're just turning into a ghost bent on vengeance. In any case, death is never fun.
6. CYBERNETIC. Get captured by the Borg? Strapped to an operating table? Injected with nanites? Whatever happened to you, you're slowly turning into something half-human, half-machine, and your squishy bits are being replaced by mechanical components.
7. LOVECRAFTIAN. You've heard their song, the terrors from beyond the stars, and even no they sing in your blood as your flesh transmutes into something ineffable and unknowable. You revel in the pain. You feel even as you seek to spread it, to herald the end of all things... Or maybe worse. You're aware of the transition as your mind becomes not your own.
8. FUSION/HIVEMIND. You've begun to fuse with the first person who tagged you - physically, mental, or both. Soon, you can't tell who is who, which one of you is the real you, as your thoughts become one. Join in the flesh song, mortal.
9. INANIMATE. Your body slowly petrifies and hardens, tuning to stone, wood, glass, or something stranger still. Or perhaps you liquefy or maybe you dissolve into the air itself.
10. WILDCARD. Pick whatever you like, combine a few options, or make up your own.




VII. HIGH SCHOOL AU
1. CLASS TIME. Pick your class, pick your seat. Whether you're paying attention or goofing off, you're interacting constantly with someone else.
2. BREAK TIME. Those precious minutes that aren't lunch, usually half an hour if you're lucky. Are you hanging out on the grass, rushing to get homework finished, or bunking off school early?
3. LUNCH TIME. Food, glorious food! ... As long as you're not eating the school lunches. What sort of chaos will you get up to in the endless queue that is the lunch line?
4. FOOD FIGHT. The natural reaction to being served school lunches: throwing them as far away from you as possible. You're caught in the middle, or maybe you're instigating it. Who knows? No one can tell.
5. STUDY PERIOD. Yeah. "Studying." They mean catching up on gossip, right? Or watching that crappy TV in the common room? Or maybe you really want to study. I'm not judging.
6. SKIPPING SCHOOL. Did you even get to school before you bunked off somewhere? Or did you just take the bus five stops further and in to town? Hope you don't get caught, either way.
7. EXAM WEEK. You're going into an exam, or just cramming every last bit of knowledge into your head. Either way, good luck! You're going to need it.
8. DETENTION. What did you do? Or were you innocent and wrapped up in your friend's scheme, and now you both have detention? I do not envy you at any rate.
9. SUMMER HOLIDAY. SCHOOL'S OUT FOR SUMMER! Burn your books, burn your uniforms. Everything is over for another 6 weeks (or however long you get off).
10. FACULTY. Oh, hello miss/sir. No, we weren't talking about bunking. Yep, you're the teacher. IMPORTANT NOTE: If you get this option, you or your partner can do a second roll for the scenario.
11. TAKE YOUR PICK. Free for you. Whether you want to pick something from the list, or make up your own scenario, this option allows that. (Of course, you could just bypass the rolling entirely.)




VIII. APOCALYPSE HOW
1. LAST ACTION HERO. You tried your best to save the world, but despite the superpowers, the teamwork, and the sacrifice of many good friends, you couldn't quite pull it off. Now you're left with your guilt and a universe where half the people left are depending on you to help them, while the rest are trying to hunt you down for your failures. Good luck with that, hero.
2. SCIENCE SAVIOR. They said it was impossible, they said it was futile, but you know that if you just got a little bit of support you could fix all of the world's troubles. Maybe your experiments are a bit on the unethical side, but the survival of humanity is depending on you! You can't let the world down. Time to grab those test-tubes and get yourself a lab assistant that doesn't mind getting their hands dirty.
3. THE LAST PERSON ON EARTH. Well, it's finally happened. A virus or disease or genetic mutation has all but wiped out members of the opposite sex and humanity is doomed. But what's this? A lone survivor? As the savior of the species, they'll be glad to lend a hand (or reproductive organ) to help restore the population, right? Maybe a little bit of persuasion is in order.
4. SO LONELY. You haven't talked to another person in days and you're starved for conversation. So when you finally meet another lone traveler it makes total sense to stick together, right? Maybe share some food, some companionship, some ammo. . . . Better hope you both get along.
5. MUTATION STATION. The bomb dropped and some people weren't fortunate enough to go in the blast. Now those left behind have to deal with nuclear winter, a dwindling food supply, and some strange additions to the human gene code. Maybe these super-humans are friendly and misunderstood. Then again, maybe they just want to eat your brains.
6. LAST DANCE. The world is ending. You know it, everyone knows it, so the only thing left to do is party like it's 1999. Complete your bucket list, do the things you never got the chance to do before, and maybe screw up the courage to do the things you were too scared to even think about doing. Oh, and watch out for looters.
7. FREEBIE SCENARIO. Anything you can think of that isn't already mentioned can go here.




IX. PARANOIA
1. EROTOMANIA. That person loves you. They belong to you. They might deny it and be with someone else but they're ridiculous. You know better here.
2. DISTRUST. Simple as it sounds, you're being lied to. You can't prove it but you're not falling for their tricks anymore.
3. HALLUCINATIONS. A vague classic. Those sounds, those sights, your senses are screwed up and the world is upside down. There's plenty of senses to screw.
4. TAINTED. You're completely wrong. Is it in your family's blood? Is it parasites? A disease? Aliens? A sin? But it's consuming you, whatever it is.
5. CONSPIRACY. Why are they after you? Who knows. Maybe you know. But everyone is in on it and you're the only one left fighting against it.
6. CONTROL. Your actions aren't your own, even if others insist they are. Somehow, either drugs or magic or something, someone is making you their puppet.
7. FIXATION. Either it's in you or someone else or a thing but this imperfection is clawing at your mind. Just fix it. Fix it and you can rest.
8. FOLIE A DEUX. The more either you or the other person talks, the more you feed into this unease and the more real it sounds. What can you two alone do?
9. REPLACEMENTS. Is it just this person or is everyone being replaced with a fake? You're not a fake, though. You won't let them replace you.
10. REAL. Is any of this real? Maybe you're dreaming or drugged. Maybe you're dead. But you need to prove that this is really happening, whatever it takes.




X. Texts From Last Night
1. Pick a character or leave that up to me
2. Go here (or make something up, insert a tfln gif whatever)
3. Comment.
4. See where it takes us!




XI. RANDOM LOCATION
1. LOST. Oh shit, how did you even get here.
2. ON THE RUN. Getting away from someone or something that's after you.
3. TREASURE HUNTING. Something you desire is here. Maybe it's being guarded or you're competing for it.
4. TRAVELLING. You turned up here on purpose. Why is up to you.
5. ESCAPE. Things have gone wrong and you need to get out of this place.
6. DISASTER. Something awful has happened whether you're the cause, a witness or there to help.
7. INVASION. It's a siege! Are you defending or attacking?
8. HOME. It's actually where you live.
9. DUEL. The predetermined location to end a feud.
10. WHATEVER. Just make something up, whatever.




XII. STOP! SOMEONE IS NAKED IN YOUR...
1. BED. Waking up after a wild night or just getting ready for bed?
2. OFFICE. Getting a leg up at work? Caught in a moment of indiscretion?
3. YARD. Someone's been communing with nature...
4. CAR. The warmth of a heater during snowfall... or the air conditioner during a melting summer.
5. BEACH. Oh look, there's a floating swimsuit... and there's its owner.
6. RIVER. God, can't even fish without hooking the wrong species.
7. BATTLEFIELD. Oops, someone looted the wrong corpse... who isn't actually a corpse.
8. SCHOOL. All right, who's been raiding the locker room?
9. BATHROOM. . . . Oh, hey, who needs a shower, right?
10. PARK. Sun and grass and lots of people to . . . watch . . . oh my.
11. . . . CLOTHES?? Okay, technically they are clothed, but it's not their clothes dammit.
12. OTHER. Because there are way, way too many more places than I can think of)




XIII. INTIMACY
1. PHYSICAL INTIMACY. It might just be innocent touches or it might be foreplay.
2. LONG CONVERSATIONS. Honest words can be more intimate than touch.
3. DRUNK. You're over-sharing or simply maudlin.
4. FORCED INTIMACY. Magic. A truth serum, whatever - you didn't mean to bare your soul, but that is precisely what you're doing right now.
5. SLOW-DANCING. There is something inherently intimate about trusting someone else to lead you, and someone trust you to lead them.
6. OTHER. Intimacy can come in many forms. Pick your poison.




XIV. OTHER
1. BOUNTY HUNTERS. You're wanted. And someone is chasing you. Maybe it isn't your fault? But maybe you did rob that bank. Either way, there's someone after that price on your head. Confront them, or run? Specify hunter or hunted.
2. TRUTH. You can't tell a lie. Maybe both of you can't, or only one of you, but now is the time to ask those embarrassing questions.
3. OBEDIENCE. The person posting is compelled to obey, no matter what. (Un)Fortunately the person commenting is compelled to give orders. All orders given must be obeyed.
4. LOTUS EATERS. The person posting is trapped in their own dream of personal paradise. The person commenting is trapped with them. Help free them, or fall into paradise?
5. PLANTS OF DEATH. Plants are trying to kill you. (Something's . . . happening.)
6. INSOMNIA. One or both of you can't sleep, and that sucks. Be awake together.
7. DREAMWALKING. One of you is trapped in the other's dream - or nightmare.
8. SOULMATES. You are meant to be, whether the relationship is functional or . . . less so. Maybe you've just met and yet you know this person (previous lives okay here).
9. PICTURE/QUOTE PROMPT. Throw a bunch of pictures and/or quotes around and see what happens, free-form style! Try RP Visualosities or A Sea Of Quotes.
10. OTHER-WORLDLY. Go to the Other-Wordly blog and hit 'Random' until you get a word. Use the word as a prompt to write up an RP scenario. Do this several times if you like. Mix & match.
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-15 02:53 am (UTC)(link)
He has to believe that the world can be a better place, otherwise everything he does is pointless and he becomes this jaded lawyer that isn't any good to his clients and a vigilante that does more harm than good. He doesn't mind being that light nor does he mind being her reminder that life can be worth living. There are certainly worse things to be.

He would like to meet Prim and he wouldn't mention a word of how he met Katniss to Prim. He'll probably come up with some sort of charming story to tell Prim like he saved her from a mugger, something that's true in intent even if it's not true in detail. From everything he knows about Prim, he can't imagine not getting along with her. He would give it extra effort in order to make sure they got along. He knows how important she is to Prim.

He can practically hear that smile and there's love and tenderness every time she touches him. The way he sees everything in shades of fire, she's practically blazing right now. He does see and he can tell so many things about how she's feeling. In some ways, he sees more than most people. Right now she is beautiful and pure in her happiness, in her love and he doesn't ever wish to see her any other way.

"I tend to agree with you right now," he whispers in the midst of the kiss. Yes, he had enjoyed that a great deal and he enjoys it now, groaning--almost gasping-- at the contact. He rocks back hard against her. When she tugs at the hem of his shirt, his hands go to pull it up over his head. His eyes close at her words and he moves against her again. "I'm all yours," he tells her, making the same sort of offer to her that she'd made to him. She can do anything she wants to him.
stillplaying: ([others] another kind of hunger)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-15 05:02 am (UTC)(link)
She'd never want to see him become another one of New York's jaded attorneys. Katniss had met too many of the jaded, corrupt ones in the Games. The men and women that didn't have the least bit guilt when it came to defending the criminals in charge of the underground fighting ring. Because of that, she had been slightly wary of Matt when he had told her about his day job. But Matt's so much better than those lawyers. He and his friend Foggy both. They're good people. She couldn't imagine anyone else but Matt to serve as her reminder of the world being a better place.

A charming story like that would suit Katniss just fine. It's close enough of the truth. Close enough at least, that if Prim studied her sister closely, she might understand that starry-eyed look on Katniss' face. The reason why her sister, who never had time for boys before leaving home at sixteen, had fallen so deeply for an older man. For now, it's still something to dream about. Katniss needs to be a lot more secure in herself before she can face Prim face to face. But at least she can email and text her sister now, after a painful two year absence.

Before tonight, Katniss never understood how someone could hear a smile. Or how much love could be conveyed in touch. Her senses aren't anywhere as developed as his. They'll never be. But she doesn't doubt his words when he says that he sees her in his own way. Those shades of fire of his are very fitting tonight. She feels on fire; every emotion and every nerve are alive and ablaze with sensation. It's overwhelming but for once, that's okay. She's happy to let herself be enveloped like this.

"Knew you were smart," she replies, half her words muffled as she continues to give in to that need to devour his kiss. Even the way he rocks back against her doesn't get her to stop; she just moans into his mouth instead. The only time she breaks contact is to pull his shirt over his head. Katniss tosses it somewhere, not quite paying attention to wear. A quick smile crosses her face. Even with his scars, he's gorgeous. She wants to run her hands over every sculpted muscle but the control that would take is long gone. Especially when he echoes her offer from earlier. She sucks at his lower lip as she uses her foot to push down the band of his sweatpants and release him. Remembering his answer to her own offer, she answers, "All I want is you."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-15 04:25 pm (UTC)(link)
He hadn't been offended. He knows the reputation that lawyers get. He and Foggy had worked for a big firm for a while and Matt hadn't been able to stomach what they were doing to people. That's why Nelson and Murdock went into business. He'd gone into law to right injustices, not to make more of them. He can't imagine that he'll ever get so bitter that will change. If he does, he needs to get a new day and night job.

Sticking as close as possible to the truth without revealing too much is usually better for that very reason. Matt is still worried about that older man part, still worried that people who are important (like Prim) won't understand it. Matt certainly isn't going to push her to see her younger sister, but he is glad that she's able to text her and email her. He knows that's a comfort to both sisters.

It's amazing what even the average person can hear when they listen. The way he sees the world might have never been this appropriate because he feels the same way, but rather than pain it's with an intense pleasure and desire that it's practically a need more immediate than food or water, something more akin to breathing. It is overwhelming, but in the best way. Matt feels like he could drown very happily in all of these sensations and emotions.

He's got no desire to break the kiss either, just as happy to be devoured by it as she is. All those muffled words and moans continue to fuel his desire until he's convinced he's going to combust. They can find their clothes later; clothes hardly seem like anything important in this moment. In all honesty, he doesn't want her to find that control, not right now. They've got lots of time to learn each other's bodies, to explore and to touch. The way she sucks on his lower lip pulls another groan out of him from deep inside of him. Once she's pushed his sweatpants below his hips, he sheds them quickly, pushing them off the edge of the bed. It seems impossible, but when she echoes his answer to that question another wave of desire and love racks his entire body. He presses his lips to hers and reaches down to guide himself into her, thrusting deep then pausing to catch his breath, breaking the kiss to gasp. "Oh, God, Katniss."
stillplaying: (Default)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-15 08:01 pm (UTC)(link)

If he did change, at least Katniss wouldn't have a reason to love him anymore. He wouldn't be that man that she had fallen in love with, the one who had saved her from such a crappy life. Unless she changed, too. Katniss had come close. She had become bitter and numb to the cruelties in the world. There had been no point to fight against the people that had held her captive. There would always be someone else to take their place. A new abuser of the system and the people within it. So she had added to the cruelty and suffering in the world. What other choice had there been? Katniss understands that there is a choice now. That despite her previous misconceptions, there were good people that cared about the common man. She never wants to disappoint the man that had rescued her. She likes who she is now a lot better than who she used to be.

Katniss has no idea if Prim would understand. Mostly, she thinks that her sister would be in shock to see Katniss with any man, closer to her age or not. And, she hopes, happy for her. Pleased that for once, Katniss is doing something for herself. Being selfish enough with love to find someone else, someone aside from Prim, to live for. If not for her sister, she would have found reason to stop living long ago. At least she has Matt now.

Somehow, at some point in the night, Matt's instilled this need in her that outweighs any other need. He's become more necessary than food or water or even breathing. Without him, survival might as well be futile. What would be the point, now that she knows what it's like to be tangled up with his body? The taste and smell and feel of him surrounding her? His words, his gasps and groans - all the noises his make and their bodies make when they come in contact with each other - are like music to her. This is what sex ought to be like. Matt was right all along. It shouldn't be some sort of obligation, a way to earn more money from the people that would already use her in the arena. It should be all-consuming. This.

A complete and utter loss of control. She's never abandoned her thoughts like this before. Instead, there's always been that small corner of her head that she'd retreat true when with a patron. She'd act as they expected, service them like they expected, but she'd never give herself over like this. There's nothing in this world beyond Matt. Beyond making him groan and squirm and make him lose all control as well. And it seems to work. Before she even fully realizes that his sweatpants are finally gone, he's inside of her with one hard thrust and she nearly comes all over again. And suddenly that's all that matters. Being filled by him. Having Matt as deep inside of her as physically possible. What else is there to being alive than this? Than hearing him gasp her name so reverently?

"Matt," she whispers lovingly, placing her hands on his cheeks and bringing his head down for another kiss. For a few seconds, she lets the kiss be tender and loving. As soon as she moves her hips though, and another ripple of desire and pleasure radiates through her body, she gives back into that passion. Moaning, she crushes her lips hard against his and thrusts her tongue into his mouth to tease him into hers.

preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-15 11:43 pm (UTC)(link)

She hadn't had a choice, which is what he will keep reminding her. If she'd refused, she would have died. There are definitely good people in the world, but sometimes the evil of the world overshadows them especially if one is right in the thick of it. He won't be naive enough to say that she can't disappoint him, but he does believe that she won't. He believes that she'll continue to choose good and to rise above her past. It's an amazing thing, liking who you are.

Matt hopes for the same thing. Happiness and love together are rare enough a find that Matt doesn't think anyone ought to begrudge another regardless of where they find that love and happiness. If Prim loves Katniss the way that Katniss loves her, it won't even be a question.

Anything less than this does seem pointless. This is why he'd wanted to slow down, why he'd wanted her to realize that anything with him would be different than her previous experiences. This is why he'd wanted to confess his feelings for her and why he's so glad that she'd confessed hers. It makes everything so much better.

He's glad that she doesn't retreat anywhere. He wants her to be fully present, fully aware and here because it would be a shame to miss any part of this. There's a part of him that's honored and pleased to be able to be this person for her, the first person she hands her control over to, the person to be able to teach her that sex should be like this. He is made of need and want the same way that she is right now, so much so that it's almost overwhelming in the best sort of way. He doesn't want it to ever be any different than it is right now. He feels her shiver and shudder around him, that control slipping a little further and it begins to unravel even more of his control.

He's all too happy to move into the kiss and he moans softly when she moves her hips with him. That crushing kiss that invites him to taste her mouth with his tongue, to tease at it, makes his heart slam even harder and faster against his chest. He continues to move against her as the kiss deepens and lingers, his hands gripping tightly at her hips.

stillplaying: ([action] kissing in bed)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-18 02:06 am (UTC)(link)
She hadn't had a choice. For a long time, Katniss suspects that the words will be easier to say than to actually accept. She could've (should've?) refused to fight. She should have been as noble as the others who had willingly given up their lives rather than dirty their hands. It's an argument that she thinks can go on just about forever. But it's also something that she'll forever continue to atone for. That has to mean that she's not all bad, right? That there is some good in who she's chosen to be? And that being around a man like Matt might just make her a better person.

So pointless. But Katniss has to still think that slowing down was a little pointless, too. Words are easy to manipulate. A lie, when properly phrased, is so easy to believe in. But actions? She thinks actions are harder to hide. It had taken a few months for Katniss to learn to hide her revulsion during fights and sex and even then, she ultimately just retreated inside of herself until it was all animal instinct. He didn't have to confess anything to her. Katniss suspects that she'd still know how much he loves her from his touch anyway. Wouldn't that have been just as good?

There's no reason to retreat everywhere. Matt is everything she wants. He's everything that she thinks she could ever want in a lover. And she's loved him since the moment he pulled off his mask, maybe even before. Since the moment he interrupted her last fight. Missing any part of this would be wrong. Like denying something necessary to her very core. Like breathing. More than breathing. She's handed over everything to him, every inch of control, and it's wonderful. Trusting someone with her body this much is wonderful.

He's begun to unravel as well. The way he thrusted into her without asking for her permission, let alone without any kind of second thought, confirms it. The moans he makes, the way he continues to move against her, kiss her, and hold her as he chases after his own pleasure makes it all the more real. But it's not enough. She's become lost to all of this, nothing but want and need and nerve endings full of pleasure, and she wants him to join her. She grabs one of the hands on her hips and moves it up to her breast.

"Let go," Katniss insists, nearly whispering the words into his mouth. "God, Matt, please. Just let go."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-18 05:08 pm (UTC)(link)
Matt will continue to believe that the good was always there, he just gave her a chance to be that person. And it probably will take some time for her to truly accept that she hadn't had a choice, but eventually it will happen because Matt will keep telling her that. He will keep reminding her of it until she accepts it.

Except that Matt can literally hear the lie and he's awful at lying himself. Matt is fine with action and he agrees that sometimes they are easier to believe. However, when someone repeats an action so many times it becomes automatic, robotic and easy to lie with. Matt had wanted to make sure that she hadn't done that here and tonight. He'd wanted her to know his intent behind his actions and he'd wanted to know her intent as well. Matt doesn't think so, despite how they can be manipulated words are important, but then he makes his living (such as it is) with words. They'll have to agree to disagree on that front, but the outcome had been the same so they'd both won.

Loving Katniss had grown on him. At first he'd just wanted to save her, he'd wanted to give her a second chance. He still wants that, but as he got to know her, as he begin to see the courage and strength she had inside of her, he began to fall in love with her. Even then, he'd denied it because of her age, because of what he knew (so little) of her romantic experience, because of her past. She needed safety and security, not a complicated, romantic relationship, but it'd only gotten harder, denying his feelings for her, especially as he began to suspect that she had feelings for him that went beyond a savior complex. This is what he wants, all of her control, all of her and anything less won't do. That's why he'd wanted to slow down. However, he's very, very glad that they're not slowing down now, that he's stopped denying his feelings for her.

He'd started to unravel the moment she'd kissed him with such emotion, the moment she'd started to hand over her control to him. It's just reached a point that he can't control it anymore. He's lost to the need and want and pleasure the same way that she's lost, or he's on the edge of being lost. He gasps when she moves his hand up to her breast then groans and flicks his thumb as it, squeezing as he does.

It's her words that finally do it though, that plea and his name on her lips. He thrusts deep into her a couple of more times before crying out and completely losing control. He rocks deep into her and lets pleasure wash over him as he collapses against her. "Katniss," he whispers into the crook of her neck.
stillplaying: ([happy] a spark of hope)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-19 04:44 pm (UTC)(link)
His simple faith in humanity is exactly what Katniss needs. It's exactly the sort of attitude that keeps her going. Exactly the reason why she really believes that living around Matt will make her a better person. How can he not, when he makes his beliefs so obvious? Especially his belief in her.

There are still a number of things she has yet to learn about his abilities. It amazes her every time she learns something new about him. There are so many things that normal people don't even realize. That they take for granted every day. Katniss still isn't all that great at lying herself though she's learned. She's had to learn to stay alive. But lying with her body is still easier to do than with her words. Around Matt, though, she can't lie at all. It has nothing to do with his powers and everything to do with how much he means to her. She doubts it'll ever be any other way.

Katniss doesn't want to admit that initially, it probably had been a savior complex that attracted her to him. She had spent two years dependent entirely on herself, determined not to let anyone manipulate her any more than they had. She had seen some of the other children, the ones that had been there as long or longer as she had, develop some sort of Stockholm Syndrome. She had seen others fight and fight until they had been deemed relatively too costly to keep around. That wasn't going to be her. But then she had gone and fallen for the first man that rescued her anyway. Sometimes, she hates herself for it. But now that she suspects that it has become a lot more than that, she doesn't hat herself nearly as much.

Besides, what would be the alternative? Not have Matt in her life? Not love him as he deserves to be loved? That's not an option. Katniss has never loved anyone before and now that the emotions have been reciprocated, she loves being in love even more. It feels too good. Too good on so many levels. Hearing a man say he loves her and mean it. Being surrounded by him like this. He moves inside of her and it makes her feel so filled and complete in a way she never knew sex could feel. She's so lost to this, to him, and when he plays with her breast, she finds herself moaning and picking up her own pace, desperate to come again.

It doesn't take much. Not when Matt surrenders his control and thrusts deeper and something inside of her snaps again. The pleasure washes over her and she cries his name again, barely noticing as he comes as well. She lies there sated, happily covered by his body. One hand keeps his head buried in the crook of her neck and the other rests on his back. Katniss sighs happily. He's right. This is exactly how sex ought to be. "You're right," she whispers. "This was amazing."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-19 08:33 pm (UTC)(link)

He's certainly not going to argue with her belief. Sometimes that's all someone needs to keep going, to change their lives, to be a better person: belief. Besides, it will be good to have someone who believes in him when he loses faith in himself and what he's trying to do, and he does sometimes.

She'll learn over time. It's not that he's deliberately keeping anything from her. It's more an effort not to overwhelm her combined with the fact that he's never really told anyone much about his abilities. He'd told Claire more than anything and she'd walked out because his life was far too difficult, dangerous and complicated for her. He didn't blame her. He still doesn't. He doesn't begrudge her anything she had to do to survive and that includes lying, but he doesn't want her to lie to him. He won't lie to her and he doesn't think there's any need to lie to him. He's glad that she finds it impossible to lie to him as selfish as that may be. He hasn't lied to her about anything and he doesn't intend to start.

As long as it's got nothing to do with a savior complex now. He wants her to love him for who he is, flawed and real, not always a savior (though he tries). It's probably normal to develop something like Stockholm Syndrome in that situation. People want to be able to trust someone, to care for them and in a situation that's so horrible, they turn to the only constants. Maybe one of these days she won't hate herself for loving him at all. Though, there are moments where he wonders if he's taking advantage of her by caring for her the way he does. He's hardly given her a chance to experience a normal life and maybe she needs that. She ought to meet people her own age, go out with a variety of people and learn what life is like for most people her age. He's selfish though and as long as she's happy, he's happy keeping her to himself.

He's got every intention of making sure that she continues to love being in love, that it continues to feel good in every possible way. He may be too selfish to tell her that she's got a life to live, but he's not too selfish to make sure that she's happy in love with him. She makes him just as happy. In fact, it's something that Karen and Foggy will probably comment on in the future. It'll give him an edge when he's out fighting because he's got someone that is waiting for him to come home and a reason not to lay down (though Murdock men never have been very good at quitting anyway, even when they should). He manages to hold on just long enough to drive her closer to that orgasm because he promised amazing and he wants to live up to that.

He's got absolutely no desire to move anytime soon, not as long as she's happy this way. He takes a deep breath of her, everything sated and humming inside of him. He can't help but chuckle at her words, the sound vibrating and rolling throughout his chest. He smiles against her skin. "Amazing is an excellent word for it. Also the literal meaning of awesome. I am in awe right now."

stillplaying: ([happy] a spark of hope)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-19 10:12 pm (UTC)(link)
She's seen what dedicated friends Foggy and Karen are. Even though Foggy had been a little skeptical of her when they had first met, they had both accepted her as a part of Matt's life early on. Back when she had just been his roommate. That isn't the case anymore, though Katniss isn't ready to jump to the conclusion that Matt's willing to consider her his girlfriend anymore. Whatever it is, she hasn't gotten any strange looks from either of them yet. Matt has more than enough people to believe in him. Ultimately, he doesn't need her, too.

At least she's gotten comfortable enough with him that she doesn't hesitate when she has a question. He doesn't seem to mind answering them either. Of course, it probably helps that she had some suspicion about them to begin with. Unlike Claire, Katniss had met him in the midst of the fight. She had tried to kill him. And then she had watched him do the impossible and defeat men that Katniss thought would own her forever. She knew that his life was dangerous from the start. Besides, it's not like hers has been all that safe.

It might have started as a savoir complex, a girl head over heels for the man who had rescued her, but within that first month of living with him, it had turned into something else. She had met his friends (even though she had done her best to avoid them after those initial meetings). She had seen the work he did as a vigilante and as a lawyer. She talked with him, joked with him, and had fallen in love with him completely. He's become that someone she wants to and does trust. Her normal life ended the moment her father had died. What's the point of starting one now, six years later? She'd rather be with him, even if she is a good twelve years his junior.

If that's what Matt considers selfish, she's okay with that. She likes Matt's idea of selfish. Keeping her in his life, keeping her happy. She has been happy living with him these past few months. The time has flown by faster than she could imagine it ever going. Life has actually been good. Tonight, it's become even better. They both have that stubbornness in common. But she's happy to add to his determination to live. It's exactly as it should be.

Matt had promised her amazing and that's exactly what it had been. But she hadn't doubted it. He always does his best to keep his promise to her. Why would now be any different? She can feel when he chuckles and wonders for a second if this is what it's like for him. Not seeing but feeling the world around him. "I'm the one in awe right now," she says, stroking his hair gently. Katniss has never wanted to stay this close to someone after sex before but frankly, putting any distance between their bodies is inconceivable. She hesitates for a second before whispering, "Thank you, Matt."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-19 10:50 pm (UTC)(link)

He's very lucky and he knows that. There's not a day that goes by that he doesn't feel guilty lying to Karen about Daredevil, but knowing puts her in danger. He hadn't told Foggy so much as he simply found out.Claire had found out much the same way. Foggy and Karen are good people, very good people.He doesn't blame them for being skeptical, but they'd trusted Matt and the more he told them about her, the more they accepted her. Matt considers her his girlfriend though he probably won't come right out and tell Foggy or Karen that, but if the subject comes up, he won't hesitate to tell them either. For example, when asked how Katniss is, Matt will respond with something like 'she's good. we're ah...dating'. He wants to know what Foggy and Karen think, though ultimately he knows that if he's happy, they'll be happy about it. He does need her to believe in him because his feelings for her are different than his feelings for Foggy and Karen. It's important that she believe in him and in some ways, her belief has a bigger impact on him because of his feelings.

That's a very good thing and he never minds answering her questions. How else is she supposed to find out about things besides asking questions? He's always grateful to have that peek into what she's thinking and learning as well. It's a hint about how her mind works and how she's progressing. He likes that. True enough, and maybe that's why things will work out between them, why she won't shy from a life with him regardless of the complications.

That will make him very happy to know. He'd rather be with her as well regardless of her age. They seem to work well together and he doesn't imagine that'll change because they're romantically involved now.

It's funny how time does move faster when you're happy. It's hard for him to believe that she's been here so many months already. It's been good though, and he's been happier just having her around than he has been in a long time.

In some ways, yes this is what it's like. Someday he'll have to blindfold her and try to recreate some sort of experience that's similar to his for her if she's really curious. He can't help but smile against her neck at her words. She can feel the smile for certain. "You don't have to thank me for anything at all, Katniss. This--this was my pleasure."

stillplaying: ([happy]  in on the joke)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-20 12:21 am (UTC)(link)
Some secrets you just need to keep. Katniss understands that better than others. Prim will forever be better off thinking that Katniss had been an au pair abroad the last couple of years. Shame does drive a lot of her need to keep the Games a secret from her sister. But there is the need to keep her safe. Most of the people responsible are dead or in jail but there are still the patrons. Matt couldn't get everyone. She hopes that Foggy and Karen accept this change in Matt's relationship with her. It's not so much that Katniss cares what they think as she knows how much Matt relies on them. And she never wants to do anything to hurt him. Not on purpose, anyway.

She believes in him. In Matt Murdock and in the Daredevil. It's just that the man that Katniss loves is capable of some incredible things and sometimes, she doubts that she could ever compare.

When she let herself have a moment of wistfulness, all it took was thinking logically about their lives and she can't think of any reason why things might work out between them. Though both their lives have been complicated, she sometimes doubts that they couldn't have led more different lives if they tried. But opposites can attract. Katniss had seen that with her parents. And they're happy. He loves her after all, and in the best kind of way. For now, she wants that to be enough.

She's noticed that slight change in his demeanor. The way he seems more content to come home to her rather than the awkwardness that had existed when she first moved in. She likes it better this way. More so now that her assumptions behind his happiness have been proven wrong.

"I noticed," she can't help but quip, feeling his smile and smiling herself. They're still lying naked on top of the bed sheets and searching for a blanket to cover herself is one of the last things on her mind when she has Matt to keep her warm. His body is a heavy weight that she's not used to but Katniss likes the feel of it regardless. It's just... right. "I felt it," she continues, suddenly feeling the urge to keep the moment light rather than dive back into that deep emotional discussion that landed them in the bed to begin with. "And liked it. A lot. So much for that condom."
preemptiveforgiveness: (What?)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-20 04:31 pm (UTC)(link)
And that's part of the reason that Matt will keep Katniss' secret. He understands that need for keeping people safe and for not exposing everything to everyone for lots of different reasons. Foggy and Karen will be fine. It might take a little bit to adjust, but they care about him.

There's no need to make any comparison. Matt knows that he was gifted with some special abilities and that's why he does what he does. He can. Katniss can do other things that Matt can't. This isn't a contest.

Opposites can attract and those differences can compliment each other. That is enough, for now and if they work for it, for the rest of their lives.

Well, it had been an adjustment for both of them, but they've survived that and come out better and happier. They'll continue to survive the things that life and their relationship throw their way and come out better on the other side.

"Smart ass," he mumbles, that smile still on his face. He knows he should probably move, but he's content, almost blissful right now. He doesn't want to move. She can't see it now, but he blushes ever so slightly at that. Of course, that bliss is destroyed with five words. He groans (and it's not one of those good groans from earlier). "Fuck. I'm sorry. I should have--I got carried away." He shifts a little and pushes himself up on one elbow. "That was my responsibility and I completely lost it."

Of course, now he's worried about babies and pregnancies and how that really would ruin her future.
stillplaying: ([sad] damn it)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-20 05:29 pm (UTC)(link)
They'll keep each other's secrets. Not as a measure of leverage or blackmail or anything of the sort, but out of mutual understanding. They both have secrets in their lives and to both of them, those secrets are vital to maintain to protect those they love. Sometimes she thinks that might have been the basis of their friendship. Not savior complexes or misplaced sympathy, but understanding.

She thinks that there's a need for comparison. Then again, she's spent the past two years being compared to the other top fighters, determined to stay on top so she'd make it out of the next fight alive. Katniss can't help it. Especially when she considers everything he can do. With the proper training, she's certain he'd be as good with a bow as she is.

She hopes that they'll survive. That given a year from now, they'll both be alive and in this bed to celebrate an anniversary of something that Katniss suspects ought to have been impossible. But more than that, she hopes it'll become something more than survival. Katniss has done far too much surviving lately.

No, he shouldn't move. And when he does, propping his body up on an elbow, she can't help but murmur her disappointment. It feels cold in the room now that his body isn't covering her. She frowns, wanting to reach for him but hesitating. He had pulled away for a reason and what if it's not just out of fear? She hugs herself instead, turning on her side to look at him and curling her legs into her body. It makes her angry. Hurt. Sad. She hates herself for saying anything. The moment is ruined, isn't it?

"Don't worry," she mutters, forcing herself to look at him even though she wants to to look anywhere but at the moment. Not that it'd matter. He's probably picked up on her reaction already. "Don't apologize. I wanted you to get carried away. I'm on the pill. Pregnant kids can't fight and not all of my... Not all of them were as thoughtful as you. If you can't fight, you don't survive. As soon as I had the money, I started."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-20 07:48 pm (UTC)(link)

As far as basis goes, understanding is a reasonably good one. Lack of understanding certainly has sunk a number of relationships without doubt so they could do much worse.

He's got some advantages that most people don't, like being able to sense vibrations in the air which helps him judge aim, distance and minute movements. That's not even considering the incredible sense of hearing he's got. Yes, with some training he would probably be really good with a bow, but there are things that he'll never be able to do that she can do. He's been gifted with extraordinary abilities, but he's given up things as well. In any case, he doesn't think comparison or competition is necessary.

He hopes for the same thing. That's what all of the talk about slowing down had been for: living. Survival is all well and good, but it pales in comparison to actually living. He wants them both to have a chance to do that together. He might have to push her out of her comfort zone a little, but he's okay with doing that as well.

He senses the negative shift in her body language and her emotions. In an effort to combat that, he reaches over to run his hand down her arm. The moment isn't ruined, just interrupted.

He swallows hard at her explanation. It's a good thing that she's on the pill, but her explanation makes him furious all over again at the people who did this to her. He nods a little, sliding his hand up to push her hair off her face and run his fingers through it. "Come on. Let's get under the blankets. I don't want you to get cold." And now that he's cooling down from the heat of the moment, the room is a little chilly. He's not going anywhere and he's got every intention of snuggling up under the blankets with her.

stillplaying: ([sad] i don't want to lose you too)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-20 11:00 pm (UTC)(link)
That most people don't? Katniss wouldn't (and hasn't) hesitated to tell him that the advantages Matt have go beyond what most people have. As far as she's concerned, he might as well be up there with Captain America when it comes to possessing abilities that most people lack. But he's so much better than the Captain in her opinion. He's the one who saved her.

Living. It's still strange to think that she can actually live again. Even prior to being tricked into the underground arena, she hadn't been living. She had just been surviving, working insane hours instead of enjoying being a teenager. Living is something new. Katniss has accepted that she'll never get those years back, nor does she really want them. She would have been an awkward teen anyway. Making up a new life, even if it means letting Matt push her out of her comfort zone, seems like the best approach.

It does help when he places his hand on her arm. Katniss expects him to continue to pull away from her, especially when she brings up the fights and her previous sexual experience. He should pull away from her if he has any common sense. Instead he starts to play with her hair and the gesture makes her smile even though she also feels like she's on the verge of tears. He shouldn't want her. He shouldn't keep touching her so fondly.

Katniss stays quiet for a few seconds, studying his face before reaching for the top of the blankets. She wriggles her way under them but still maintains a distance between their bodies. Finally she breaks the silence with a barely audible whisper that she doesn't doubt Matt will still hear. "I'm a killer and a prostitute, Matt. Why would you still want me?"
preemptiveforgiveness: (Kiss)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-21 12:38 am (UTC)(link)
He'll appreciate that she thinks he's better than Captain America. Those advantages are the major reason that Matt believes he's the one that has to help out. He can be the one.

Matt isn't one of those people that believe the best years of your life are your teenage years or even your childhood. After his father had been killed, his existence had been a miserable one for the most part. It hadn't gotten better until he'd gone to Columbia. In his experience, getting out of your comfort zone is where living really starts, but then his experience isn't exactly normal either.

He's not going to pull away from her. He's got his own battles and sexual experiences in his past. The past is exactly that: past. He likes to think he's got a good deal of common sense and he's generally acknowledged as a smart guy. He touches her fondly because he's fond of her. He was even before tonight and the shift in their relationship.

While she's wriggling, he gets up properly to get into bed, leaving the blankets gathered about halfway down his torso. He scoots close enough that he can reach out to touch her easily enough, but he doesn't, not at first. He lays on his side facing her with a hand under his head. He's listening to her, trying to gauge her reaction and what she's thinking. Of course, he still hears that whisper. At her words, he moves closer, moving one hand up to cup her cheek, his thumb sliding tenderly along her jaw.

"Those are things that you were and you're not anymore." He presses a kiss to her forehead, resting his lips there a moment. "I want you because you are strong. You are loyal. You're incredibly stubborn and independent. I strongly suspect that when you put your mind to it there is nothing you can't do. You're a survivor and a fight. You're beautiful and funny. You care so much about the people you do choose to love that it takes my breath away."
stillplaying: ([sad] i'll live to regret this)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-21 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
From the little he's revealed, she knows that Matt's childhood hadn't been normal either. Selfishly, she's thankful for that. It makes her feel less alone in the world. She never met anyone in the Games that she could relate to in that way. Almost everyone was too frightened or too determined to survive. Friendship just wasn't an option. Matt had been her first friend in a long time. That had been the first push out of what had become her comfort zone. Everything after has just contributed.

He makes it seem so easy to separate the past from the present. But she doesn't know how to. Not yet. The past is still too recent and too raw for her. She needs to focus on the present. Especially now. Matt is so much better than anything else she could imagine for herself. She just wants to be good enough for him. Worth this kind of touch and affection, especially given this sudden shift in their relationship.

It's impossible to miss the way he moves closer to her in the bed. His movements are much more graceful than her own and his body is like a magnet calling to her. Laying on her side to watch him, she wraps her arms back around herself in another hug. Maybe she shouldn't have said anything. Maybe reality is finally sinking in. How many seconds will it take for Matt to realize he should leave her here? Or, smarter, send her away.

But he doesn't. And as soon as he places his hand on her cheek, she closes the distance between them and hugs Matt tightly instead. His body is hard, almost all muscle, but warm and welcoming against her own. A tear finally slips when he kisses her forehead. More tears follow as he talks. Matt's a lawyer. He has to be good with his words. But these are perfect. "You might be one of the best things to ever happen to me."
preemptiveforgiveness: (Default)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-22 07:11 pm (UTC)(link)

Even when his father was still alive his childhood wasn't normal. He'd had his first drink of whiskey at nine so that his hands would be steady when he was sewing up a gash on his father's face. His mother hadn't been in the picture for as long as he could remember. It does help him relate to her, to understand the life she'd led. He hadn't had many friends in the orphanage because people were always moving out. There had been Stick, but eventually he'd left as well. He'd been so very lucky in getting Foggy as a room mate. His friendship with Katniss is something that Matt enjoys and needs as much as Katniss does. It's something he wants to maintain even as their relationship evolves.

It's not easy at all. He knows that, but it's something that she needs to do in order to move on. The more she gets settled and the more she adjusts to her life now, the further behind all the horrors of her past will be. She'll be able to put it behind her and focus on her new life. It'll probably always haunt her in some way. The horrible things in life tend to do that, but it won't be her whole life. She's already good enough for him and worthy of love and affection, but that too will probably take some time. Really, time is the name of the game right now.

He's trained for a very long time to be graceful and fluid. She's letting her imagination run away with her and it's conjuring up nothing but bad thoughts when there's no reason for them. He's not going to send her away or leave her here.

He wraps his arms tightly around her when she closes the distance between them. He knows she's crying, but he also knows that they're not bad tears. Yes, he does have to be good with his words, but he wasn't saying those things because they sounded good. He was saying them because they're true. Even in his law career, he tries not to say things that aren't true. "Good. I like being one of those things," he whispers to her. "You deserve more good things, Katniss."

stillplaying: (Default)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-22 09:42 pm (UTC)(link)

At least she had about twelve years of normality. They might have been poor but wasn't half of New York anyway? While her father had been alive, she had gotten to go to school. Sure she had to babysit her sister more often than not as soon as she was old enough to be responsible for them both but that hadn't ever bothered her. And she hadn't had many friends (mostly because she wasn't all that good at making them to begin with) but she had a couple. It had been a good life with a loving family. Very different than the life Matt had his whole life. But that good part of her life has felt much more like a dream for the past however many years. Anyway, she had been the one to leave them in the end. It's not something she intends on doing again. She needs his friendship, too. And his love.

It's something that she's at least working on. Keeping the past in the past and not letting the Games define who she is anymore. She doesn't want to be that girl. She never wants to be that girl again. Katniss knows that it's naïve to think that she might be the girl she would have been if her father hadn't died. Having that life is impossible. But she wants to be someone. Someone that she thinks is worthy of Matt, regardless of whether he already thinks so. She wants to be a girl who doesn't have to play games but that might never be a reality.

She is letting her imagination run wild. Katniss just can't help it. For the first time, she's with someone that she doesn't want to leave. In her mind, it only makes the most sense if he does leave her.

But she can at least acknowledge that she is being ridiculous when he wraps his arms around her in return. A man planning to leave her wouldn't do that. At least she hopes not. Katniss swallows hard at his words and buries her head against his chest. She can hear his heartbeat clearly like this. It's a soothing sound, almost like a lullaby. "So do you, Matt," she replies. Katniss sniffs a little as the tears start to subside. Then, as a side thought, she adds in, "I'll still be here in the morning."

preemptiveforgiveness: (It's all okay)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-23 02:52 am (UTC)(link)
True enough, but Matt isn't complaining about his childhood while his father was alive. He'd been a good father, just an unconventional one and yes, they'd been poor but his father had always provided what he'd needed. Ultimately, Matt thinks they'd both had good enough childhoods until everything went wrong. Sometimes staying is hard because if you're the one to leave it seems to hurt less. Matt understands that, but he's glad that she wants to stay now.

That's all she can do: work on it. Matt will definitely try to help Katniss stay the person she wants to be and become the person she wants to be. He doesn't want her to have to be that girl ever again either. She's got the rest of her life to become someone she wants to be, to become whatever she wants to be.

No, a man planning to leave her wouldn't do that, at least Matt wouldn't. He bows his head to rest his lips against the top of Katniss' head. "So will I," he promises her in a whisper. "You can sleep if you want to," he tells her.
stillplaying: ([others] needing company)

[personal profile] stillplaying 2016-03-27 05:03 pm (UTC)(link)
Neither of them had much to complain about before losing their fathers. Their lives had been good for the most part. His less normal than hers but nothing either of them regrets. Too bad things couldn’t stay the way they wanted it. Too bad they both had to lose their fathers. She’d like to think that her own would like Matt. Approve of someone with his morals and standards despite the age gap between them. She has absolutely no intention of leaving. Not anytime soon. Not ever if she can help it. Having a home again (which is what the apartment had become after only a month of residing within) is n intoxicating feeling.

Sharing that home with someone who loves her? Even more so. Maybe all of this will be enough to keep her from ever being someone she never wanted to be. There’s so much opportunity in her life now. Given so many gifts she never should have had. The rest of her life is suddenly so much longer than it had seemed a year ago. And much more worthwhile to live.

Katniss sighs happily when he presses his lips against her head. Unlike the kisses they had shared just a little while ago, this one soothes rather than ignites. But she can sense the love behind the gesture nonetheless. Closing her eyes, she loosens her grip around him a little and wriggles up against him until half her body seems to cover his. One arm cradles her head against his chest while the other stretches downward across his stomach. She tangles a leg between his and when she yawns again, doesn’t bother to stifle it. She’s exhausted but sated and content, emotionally and physically. “Push me off if I get too uncomfortable,” she mumbles sleepily, remembering at the last second how sensitive Matt’s sense of touch is. “Won’t mind.”
preemptiveforgiveness: (Waking up is hard to do)

[personal profile] preemptiveforgiveness 2016-03-27 10:23 pm (UTC)(link)
Sometimes Matt wonders how different his life would be if his father had survived at least through his childhood; he wonders how different he would be. He likes to think the same thing about his father. He would be able to see through the walls that Katniss puts up, and that he'd like her. He'd probably give him a speech about how young she is, about how Matt needs to take care of her because of that, don't break her heart. These are all things that Matt has told himself, things that he'd sometimes heard in his father's voice. He's very glad that she's got no intention of leaving, though if she wanted her own place, wanted to assert her independence, he would understand. He would simply hope that they could continue dating while she did that.

He'd like to hear that. He does worry that she'll want to explore and discover who she is on her own. He worries that she'll regret that she never experienced some things like moving into her own place. Opportunity is the biggest thing that Matt has wanted to give her. She doesn't yet realize that she should have all of this and more, that she would have if the Games hadn't taken it away from her, if her life had been kinder.

He runs his fingers idly and tenderly through her hair, also a movement designed to soothe, but also to make her feel loved. He can't help but smile when she wriggles up against him, draping herself over him. He's exhausted and sated as well, though it may take him a little while to fall asleep simply because he doesn't often sleep well. He suspects that might change though. He shakes his head at her words. "Trust me. That's not going to be a problem."